Wednesday, December 29, 2010

BIG NEWS!!!!!!!

I had a blood test done on Christmas Eve and my first prenatal visit is tomorrow afternoon. To say I am excited is an understatement! Thank you, thank you, thank you for all the prayers! God finally said YES!

Friday, October 29, 2010

Guess who decided to show up "early"!

I say "early" because we weren't entirely sure of the actual due date to expect him, but her physician recommended she set up a c-section date, just in case. My sister so wanted to attempt a natural birth with Micheal, because her first son, Cain, was an emergency c-section. Cain's umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck, essentially strangling him and sending his heart rate way down every time she pushed. So, she had hopes for this birth to be natural, but the doctor on-call (hers was out of town this week) recommended this as being easier for the baby, given her insurance situation. So, another c-section it was. Mommy and baby got to go home yesterday, and I can't wait until I get to hold this sweet little fella again. He is beautiful beyond words and these pictures simply don't do him justice. Some of them are blurry, but his expressions are simply precious. Enjoy!

Micheal Ryan Watkins
Born at 7:06 p.m.
October 25, 2010
5 lb 15 oz, 19 inches long

He didn't like this "binky", it was too big for him!

I could just melt :)

And so alert!!

"Do you know how much Aunt Maymay loves you, Micheal?"

Uncle Justin & Micheal

Uncle Jamie (my dh) and Micheal...doesn't this look good on him?LOL

My dad (Pappaw) and his youngest uncle, Jeremy

Pappaw and Uncle Jared

Nana Nancy (our step-mom) and Micheal

What a precious gift God gives in the newness of a baby!!

Monday, October 25, 2010

The Simple Woman's Daybook, for October 25, 2010

FOR TODAY, October 25, 2010

Outside my window...there are a few rays of cheery sunlight trying to peek through the rain clouds. It is a beautiful scene as the rays dance with the autumn leaves that remain on their branches after last night's storms.

I am thinking...I have so far to go in my walk to become a woman who represents her Lord Jesus in her life. But, don't we all?

I am thankful for...the rain from last night (we have been so very dry up on the hill) and for God's protection from the most severe of the storms.

From the learning rooms...I am nearing the end of my class!! I have 5 grades left to make and can almost see the finish line!

From the kitchen...nothing this morning. I will probably have a "fiber" bar and a banana, but it is just me this morning, so no cooking.

I am p.j.'s still...

I am creating...not much lately. I am concentrating most of my time to the class and am really really ready for it to be done! I am still doing some cross stitching, and did recently finished up a little thing for the kitchen.

I am be an AUNT once again in a couple of weeks!! Oh yeah...I haven't told y'all yet, have I?lol....

I am reading...nothing at the moment...boy, I'm kind of dull lately, aren't I?LOL

I am hoping...everything goes well with the surgeries that are coming up. Next week is going to be a busy one!

I am hearing...the final spin of the washing machine kick in. It never ceases to amaze me how much dirty laundry 2 people can make in one week!

Around the house...things are quiet, as they typically are this time of day.

One of my favorite clothes! We have some generous friends who have given us clothes for the baby coming soon (not mine, yet) and I have loved washing them up and folding them.

A few plans for the rest of the week: Typing up the rest of the practice transcripts for the class, working on the guest (catch-all) bedroom and repainting it a color that doesn't leave your retinas crying for mercy, thinking up dishes to fix for Thanksgiving...yep, it'll be here soon!!

Here is a picture for thought I am sharing...My precious nephew and I taking a picture of his mom (my sister, who was taking a picture of us, lol) while at my mother's this week. God bless that little sweetheart :)

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Catching up...

When I said I would be back soon, I meant sooner than this! But I think I might have "jinxed" myself by thinking that. I hope I can remember all the things that have been going on since before summer began, but I'm not promising anything. Right now I have my web page toolbar crammed with blog posts I would like to read, and many more to skim over, and am enjoying the beautiful piano music from a friend's music player and basking in the peace I feel at this moment. I am so terribly inconsistent and easily distracted in so many areas of my life and, sadly and inexcusably, this includes my spiritual life. If you feel so compelled, I would appreciate any prayers for this. It catches up with me every would think I would have learned by now. I am so negligent in just sitting down and studying God's Word. I get good, healthy snacks and nibbles from my blog/Facebook friends, but rarely do I sit down and actually indulge in the feast in my own home. And I am becoming malnourished and I can feel it. My witness as His child suffers and I become so susceptible to stumbling when I should know better. Disobedient pride is crippling and I hate when I have it. But thankfully He does not leave me as quickly as I seem to leave Him so often. Out of all His sheep, I feel like the most foolish one. No smart lamb would leave their Shepherd willingly, yet still He gently-but firmly-draws me back in before I can fall down into the pit. I repent and He wipes the tears of shame away. I am thankful, so very deeply thankful. It is a feeling of wretchedness when I realize how I have wandered...never all at once, but just little steps at a time, until I realize I am tripping in the dusk away from His light. Our pastor preached a good word this morning, and the worship with other saints was balm to my soul. May He continue to draw me closer, and may He speak to you what you need to hear from Him. I praise HIM for all He is and Who He is to me, even though I surely will never ever deserve an ounce of it. May His Holy Spirit stir us and spur us on as never before, may we not grow weary in well-doing. I love you, my friends. May He bless you today, and every day, until His glorious appearing again.

Friday, August 27, 2010

.....might it be a post???

Hello friends! I apologize for the brevity of this entry, and for the length of time I have been away. But, I wanted to let you know that, should you still read my postings, I will be back with more in a while. I have several things to share, some good and some not so good. Until then, may God bless and keep you.

Saturday, March 27, 2010

A Busy Day!

Hey y'all! It's your favorite drama blog-queen back again! Hahaha. Okay, I admit...I suppose I can be sort of a drama llama at times. I'm working on it...I am way too blessed to be so depressed about things that I really don't have too much control over. Sure, I could "take the reins" and push to have things done that could make it appear I am in charge...but seriously? When you get right down to the nitty gritty I have about as much control over it as I do in the seasons and the rising of the sun. And that's OKAY. So, I'll just appreciate and try to be happy for folks who are experiencing things that I hope for our little family here. Hopefully soon I can expound on what I mean a little deeper, but right now that's all I need to say.

It has been kind of busy around here lately and I am glad for it! Some people seem to have that wonderful ability to keep going all year long, but I'm pretty sure if I had been created an animal I would have been a bear. I very nearly hibernate in the winter until Spring and her warmer weather shows up. We also live in what I call a "hobbit house", or a basement house as normal people refer to it. Our living room, kitchen and laundry room are the only rooms in the house that aren't surrounded by dirt with the kitchen and living room having the only full-size windows. I feel like that probably contributes to my hermit nature in the cold months. Oh well :) We have a home and food to fill our bellies and heat to keep us warm and Jesus in our hearts. I am so thankful, and that is an understatement. I am humbled by His goodness and mercy and am embarrassed by how selfish I can be at times. Life is GREAT and I deserve NONE of it.

My online class has been moving along rather well! I am kind of surprised at how well I am actually doing in it. As of right now I am a little more than halfway through and have an average of 91. Hopefully I can bring it up a few points, but I am passing so far!! I may end up slowing down a little bit; with the weather warming up I would like to spend some time outdoors in the yard on days I can, so I'll probably be tweaking my daily routine some.

Speaking of the outdoors, we spent ALOT of time there today. I LOVED EVERY MINUTE OF IT!! Well, most of it. Last year was the first year we had a "real" garden. It went well, I thought, all things considered. I learned a few things and got my feet wet. We ended up having enough squash and tomatoes and okra to eat fresh and a bit extra to freeze, but not a considerable amount to can and put up. So this year I wanted to make our plot bigger and see if I could plant a few different things and try to put some up.

This was our plot(s) last year

This is the beginning of this year's

We're using old railroad ties for our beds and opted for the raised bed because under the topsoil in our yard we have chert rock. Last year we had 4 ties and this year we expanded it by 3. Looking back I wish we had gotten one more and made it square instead of that odd 5-sided thing we have now (hexagon?) but our tie-supplier is a little longer a drive off than we had time for today. I am debating on buying one more...maybe we will try it like this and add another next year, lol. That's about as often as I want to move these things in a year!! Thank you Lord, for giving me a strong husband!! I love him so! I would also like to plant some "looking" plants. You know, those that you plant just because they are nice and make your yard pretty. Unless the Lord comes soon, I don't see us relocating any time soon. I would like for our home to reflect this reality. That means *GASP* making our house a little more like a real home. A work in progress ;) We have some flowers that have been blessing us this spring and the last that were planted by a previous owner, but I would like to plant a few more pretty plants that I really enjoy.

Here are some examples of already existing beauties: please forgive the drabness...not everything has jumped on the spring bandwagon yet ;)

We have some lovely trees/bushes:

We have a larger plum and some other tall tree to the left of what is in this
picture and another plum to the right of the shot...foresight would be
handy when I take pictures ;) This shot has a plum tree, azalea bush & what I think
is a tulip poplar. You can see we also have some cheery daffodils blooming and
some lilies coming up.
Another shot of the same line of trees/bushes from a
different angle
Some daffodils around Gunner's tree and this bright, bold hedge-thing,
lol. Please forgive the ugly garbage can situation...I also cleaned the
shed out today.
At the corner of the house is a smaller azalea bush.
Haven't decided if I'll keep it there or not...
Ahhhh...color :) Sorry, I couldn't resist! This was last summer.

And the lovely flowers:

daffodils and lilies

lilies up top...not sure what that thing is at the bottom left of the brick wall

Irises waaay in back to the right, and two more of those mystery plants...

Irises around the mailbox

Waaaay back there are some more irises

So, that's what is already there. I have some gladiola and peony bulbs to plant and I have a "tulip kit" started that I bought from JoAnn's earlier this month. I didn't know it took 16 weeks for them to it possible to put them out and they grow properly? I also have some areas already planned to plant in, just not sure what exactly to plant. I would post more pictures of the area, but this post is already waaaaaaaay tooooooooo looooooooooooong! And I am bushed!! Hope you all have a great Sunday!!

Friday, January 8, 2010

Oh, To Hear the Pitter Patter!!

This will probably be one of those rambling posts. "Stream of Consciousness" they call it? So get ready...

This is a topic I think about alot...possibly too much. I have so many different ideas...emotions over this. I know God alone is perfect, He has a perfect plan, and His timing is always perfect. But I also know that not everyone is called to be everything. Some women do not become mothers. For whatever reason, they never experience that pitter patter of little feet. I'm just going to flat out honest. I DO NOT want to be that woman!! I do not!! I want to experience a womb full of life, the excitement of wondering what that little one might become. I want to give birth. I want to hold and love a child that has features like my husband and me. I want to play with, and help grow a child into loving God. I want to kiss boo-boos till they are better and make peanut butter sandwiches and cut them into pieces small enough for little hands. I want to wipe the mud off chubby cheeks and marvel at the creepy crawlies they find in the yard. I want to be a very very much. I have cried so many tears. I am sobbing as I type this. I have such a deep, deep desire that I can't articulate...and I have tried. Almost a desperate feeling.

I am only 27. This September I will be 28. I know, typically, I have many years more. I have only been off birth control methods since October of 2007, and yet... I have been off them for nearly 3 years's been 3 years, Lord...please? Pretty please? I feel like Hannah, crying out to her God. Lord, can You hear me?? I can see why the priest thought she was under the influence of something else, if what I feel is close to what she felt that day in the temple. Is it idolatry to want something so badly that you think about it more days than not? Is it possible to want it too much? I can hear another content with your station now. Bloom where you're planted. A season for all things. It must be in the plan somewhere...why else would I desire it so much? I cannot believe that God would allow me to have such a strong desire and a love so deep for a little person I don't know, and yet deny me the opportunity to ever love that person.

I have a well-meaning aunt who has shared with me her doctor's name and clinic. They specialize in IVF (in-vitro fertilization) treatments for women wanting to get pregnant, and she has experienced two successful pregnancies with this route. One pregnancy resulted in twins, and we love all three of these children very much. My husband and I have visited their website, and talked about it. Now, I will not speak for any woman but myself. I cannot do this. By all I can see, they take at least one egg (maybe more?) and fertilize it with DH's sperm. I firmly believe that life begins at conception. I know our separate "contributions" have potential for life, but without their joining together, neither can become a person. That's simply how God designed it. I also believe His Word and He knits us isn't a random act. So the idea that there would be essentially more than one life created outside of my body, but possibly only one going back into my body, simply does not sit well with either of us. And the expense...for something that has no guarantee. We could not justify that method. My heart says there are too many children in this world with no one to love them, than for us to spend that sort of money on a method that is, quite honestly, unnatural. And, I will put this as delicately as I can, the means for retrieving my husband's "contribution"...I cannot stomach. Call me what you want. So, IVF is out of the discussion.

Fertility drugs? I have not ruled them out. Granted, I don't know alot about them right now. I believe there are risks associated with them, right? My aunt has shared some of her experience taking such drugs to encourage egg production for the IVF she underwent, and there are definitely risks with it...but I don't know that I would need them if we didn't take the same route she did. Does that make sense? I am not against further investigation to see if there is a medical reason we have not conceived, or if it simply is not time for us yet. I am aware that my body may be working fine and it could possibly be an issue with DH's body. I am really struggling with surrender, I think. I call myself "quiverful" in the sense that I want to let God determine our family size, and not us, but what comes to mind most of the time is simply not using birth control to keep a family small. I rarely think about the aspect of trusting Him in the "smallness" of our family too. It is almost like saying..."Lord, I trust You, but only if You want to make our family if You decide not to give us ANY, I don't want that part...I just want the HYUGE-ness." Selfish, I know. But this is about honesty, right? I go back to wondering why I would even feel what seems like a gap in our life, if we were not meant to have any.

I attended a women's weekend at a church not long ago...back in late October I think it was. There was a woman who came and spoke and her words left me in tears. She voiced the very same things I was feeling...she and her husband had been married for several years and yet they were still childless. She suffered with endometriosis and several miscarriages. She cried out to God and her words matched my heart perfectly. She says God spoke to her and simply said "I called you to be a mother. I haven't called you to be pregnant". She knew then they were meant to adopt, and God saw them through it and brought a beautiful little boy into their lives from the Ukraine (I believe is was the Ukraine...I was kind of scatter-brained that morning, but it was in that area if I am wrong). Not very long after that, even through her medical condition and knowing she would probably never carry a child and give birth, she became pregnant and had another little boy! This beautiful sister is now pregnant with their FOURTH blessing! I say all that to express my hope. I don't know what God has in store...but my heart is open and I have a great feeling of compassion to orphaned children. Shucks, I simply love children. Love them. They could have great parents, and I would still love on them, lol. I am praying that He would reveal the course for us, through my husband, because I know where my heart stands in it.

I feel like a child who really does not want to throw a tantrum, because I know it won't do me any good, but I feel that tantrum coming on. I guess you could say I throw a little one about once a month now. I can't hide my disappointment from God when "the company" shows up, so I don't even try anymore. Why can't I just be thankful that part of me works? It didn't use to...

Another aspect I have class. There is a desire (though not as strong as the other) to pay down our debt. Hopefully that will happen when I finish this course I am taking. Maybe God is waiting for me to finish my class? Maybe He knows that if I were to be pregnant and not be done with this class, it might never get done because I am just that scatterbrained? Maybe He's trying to make it easier on me (though I know life is rarely easy, especially for His people) and I'm just trying to cram everything in at once. Maybe. I guess I will have to wait and see. I will have to wait on Him.

He is still God and I am not. He is good, and I will praise Him in this storm, even if it is a broken hallelujah.