Sunday, September 12, 2010

Catching up...

When I said I would be back soon, I meant sooner than this! But I think I might have "jinxed" myself by thinking that. I hope I can remember all the things that have been going on since before summer began, but I'm not promising anything. Right now I have my web page toolbar crammed with blog posts I would like to read, and many more to skim over, and am enjoying the beautiful piano music from a friend's music player and basking in the peace I feel at this moment. I am so terribly inconsistent and easily distracted in so many areas of my life and, sadly and inexcusably, this includes my spiritual life. If you feel so compelled, I would appreciate any prayers for this. It catches up with me every would think I would have learned by now. I am so negligent in just sitting down and studying God's Word. I get good, healthy snacks and nibbles from my blog/Facebook friends, but rarely do I sit down and actually indulge in the feast in my own home. And I am becoming malnourished and I can feel it. My witness as His child suffers and I become so susceptible to stumbling when I should know better. Disobedient pride is crippling and I hate when I have it. But thankfully He does not leave me as quickly as I seem to leave Him so often. Out of all His sheep, I feel like the most foolish one. No smart lamb would leave their Shepherd willingly, yet still He gently-but firmly-draws me back in before I can fall down into the pit. I repent and He wipes the tears of shame away. I am thankful, so very deeply thankful. It is a feeling of wretchedness when I realize how I have wandered...never all at once, but just little steps at a time, until I realize I am tripping in the dusk away from His light. Our pastor preached a good word this morning, and the worship with other saints was balm to my soul. May He continue to draw me closer, and may He speak to you what you need to hear from Him. I praise HIM for all He is and Who He is to me, even though I surely will never ever deserve an ounce of it. May His Holy Spirit stir us and spur us on as never before, may we not grow weary in well-doing. I love you, my friends. May He bless you today, and every day, until His glorious appearing again.

1 comment:

  1. It is so good to see another post from you!!!

    I think if we were all honest with ourselves, like you have been, we all would admit that we often allow "life" to pull us away from the Lord from time to time. I know it's happened to me so often I'm ashamed to admit it.

    As you wrote, our Lord is ALWAYS eagerly awaiting our return. He is ALWAYS gracious with His forgivness and He is ALWAYS ready with a warm welcome.

    I am so very happy you were/are able to see where your downfall was/is. When we are honest with ourselves regarding our weaknesses, that's when HE will provide us with the needed strength to improve and achieve victory over our temptations.

    Blessings to you and yours!