Auld Lang Syne

"Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And never brought to mind?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And auld lang syne?"

Should old acquaintance be forgot,
And never brought to mind?
Should old acquaintance be forgot,
And days gone by?

Tonight 2008 will draw to a close, and 2009 will begin. I hope this coming year is a blessed one for all of us. It will probably be a trying one, with hostility toward the Truth of God growing and the economy as it is. But I remember the message our pastor shared with us this past Sunday and it was titled, "God's people will be more than fine in 2009". He had heard that title somewhere else and borrowed it. And it brought great comfort to me and really reassured in my heart something I had known all along.

"Ye are of God, little children, and have overcome them: because greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world." 1 John 4:4

"My Father, which gave them me, is greater than all; and no man is able to pluck them out of my Father's hand." John 10:29

I, as God's child, am going to be just fine. No matter what my circumstance may be, no matter if I end up poor in the sight of men, or if I am hungry, or even if I become homeless, my God is so much bigger than this place. I can rest in a secure salvation, I will rejoice in a Savior who is Sovereign and who is always with me, I will resist the world with the strength GOD provides and the promises He gives and I will remember the command to reach out to others, to try and meet them where they are because that's where God met me.

Should old acquaintance be forgot? I don't know. I had to let go of a few people this year, mostly because of losing my job (or being released, being freed, as I like to put it). But I did have to say goodbye to someone who had been a big part of my life for a while now. We had become so different that I could not any longer enjoy being with them. She was maid-of-honor in my wedding, and I was the same in hers. She was my best friend. We had met in nursing school about 4 years ago, and had become very close. I was there for her throughout her divorce from her abusive alcoholic husband, mostly in the form of her "partner in sin" as I see it now...better known as her best drinking buddy. And I was there for her when she remarried 6 months ago.

But can two walk together lest they be agreed? In August of 2007 I gave my life back to Christ. I was making a mess of it and my marriage and was tired of living life my way. God began to change my heart and I soon grew a great distaste for sin. Things I used to love and take part in regularly now disgusted me. But my friend would not, even to this day, let go of some things. And I know I cannot change people. Only the Holy Spirit can convict someone in their hearts, so I prayed for them, for her and her then soon-to-be husband. I continue to do so. I just don't understand how someone can read God's Word and then totally reject it, all the while claiming to be some follower of Christ. The last straw came a couple of weeks ago. They were both here at our home and I was excited to show her how blessed we had been with it. Things had become strained between us, I think mostly because of lack of compromise; me by not compromising what God says about certain things and by not going along with everyone else:"oh, whatever makes you happy, there are worse things out there...etc" and her not willing to compromise her comfortable lifestyle of partying and drinking to excess. But I still had hope for us. We had a relatively nice evening. I tried to overlook that every other word out of their mouths were curse words, and even using the Lord's name as profanity. I tried to overlook and had to bite my tongue that it seemed all the husband could talk about was of a sexual nature and just of juvenile habits. I even managed to keep my cool, for the most part, when we were discussing things of a medical nature (she's a RN and acted almost as if I were nothing but wrong when I talked about home births and that I just don't care for doctors and machines; I trust the body God gave me and the ability and sheer nature of that which I am. I tried to explain that I completely understood sometimes a hospital could not be helped and that there was a good purpose for all that, but I don't want to sell myself short without even trying) and I was made out to be a fool because I have some "old fashioned" ideas on things. But the final straw came when we were discussing the Bible. I lost it. I'm not proud of that, it's just the truth and I wish I would have kept my cool. But something about someone blaspheming the Word of God, in my home? Nope, sorry, I want no part of that and I will not take it laying down. She dared to use the phrase "It's 2008!" in reference to some apparent expiration date on the Bible, they must have taken the "best when used by:" sticker off my copy! Here I was being picked apart by an obviously much wiser person because I believe a woman's duty is to her home first, not the rest of the world. Because I believe when the Bible says "at home" that means, AT HOME. Because I read that and understand it as I believe God meant it to be is a greater calling than to be making $20.00 an hour at any job out there and regardless of what others say, to go against what God has put on my heart is disobedience, and that is sin. Do you have to agree with me? No! Are there circumstances where it cannot be avoided? I think that there could be and I believe God understands that. But for me to claim to be a Christian woman and not to give God's way a chance, trusting Him like He asks me to? To me, I would be sinning.

So, I had to "break-up" with her, I guess you could say. I hope I haven't burned that bridge completely, because I want to still be there for her if she needs me. I will still remember her in my prayers and in my heart, but I just can't be in her life. I cannot be condoning her lifestyle of drinking and parties and basically a complete disregard for the way God has commanded us to live by being in that atmosphere, and she has proven to me she will not have her life any other way. And it breaks my heart to have to let her go. I am now judgmental because of it. I don't try to be, I really don't think I am and I don't condemn people in my heart because that is not my place. And I have no right to...I used to be a horrible person. But I believe God has given us a standard to live by. If that makes me narrow-minded, I guess that's just how people will have to see me.

Argh!

I am so aggravated right now. I'm trying really hard to keep my mouth shut and my heart from sinning in itself but I would really like to throw a temper tantrum. I was going to do a daybook post but I'm too disgusted with it right now. I guess I need a "Blogging for Dummies" book or something, but I cannot seem to add a picture or the daybook button without messing up the text of the post. And I have no clue how to make the links compacted (does that make any sense?) Man...I need some chewing gum. Anyone have any helpful articles you might point me to? Sister needs some help, lol.

So blessed!

Does it make me a horrible person to be sorta kinda relieved that the most consumeristic holiday of this most materialistic country is almost over?

I love CHRISTmas. I love the smells of the season. I love the giving spirit, that encouragement that it's better to give than to receive...even if I see less and less of that truly acted out in people's attitudes each year. I love the music, the family and just the acknowledgement that seems to come along with it, that no matter the economic situation, being together with family and dear friends, laughing with them, hugging, loving them makes us much wealthier than we realize.

But what pains me about this past Christmas is that I don't remember hearing one mention (outside of church) of this being the day we celebrate Jesus' birth day. I know it's probable that my Savior wasn't born in winter, I know it's probable that our annual Christmas plays and songs aren't mirror reflections of how the blessed event took place, there are alot of "artistic liberties" that probably take place. But that isn't the point! The point is that God's Son willingly left His throne of glory and came to this sin-sick world in the most vulnerable form imaginable for us. For me. For you. For Billy Graham and for Marilyn Manson. And we turn it into what? Into something almost ugly. Into something that almost depresses many people. And me. I can't imagine how it must pain our Lord. But it pains me and for Christ Jesus to be so much more loving, more compassionate, more merciful than I can be on a really awesome day...it must break His heart. It kind of scares me...but it definitely shows where our world is today in priorities. We only want God and Christ in our daily lives when it's convenient for us or when we have no other choice. It's sad. Is it any wonder I just want to hide away from this world most days? And these are Christians!
God, please help me to have more compassion. More love. More mercy. I am seriously lacking in some of these. Not all the time, but alot of the time. And I know that saddens Him. But I'm not going to give up, I know He hasn't. Everyday He works on me and even when I am at my worst He will remind me that I am His, and noone...nothing...can pluck me from His hand. And for this I owe Him my life. I certainly am a work in progress. Thank You for not giving up on me, for not giving me up. Thank you so much. We really did have a blessed CHRISTmas.

We are blessed beyond measure. Blessed beyond what we could ever deserve. Every day we are blessed, not just one day a year. And one day a year is not enough time to even begin to show how blessed we feel. In fact, it's going to take me a whole eternity, or longer, to truly share my thankfulness. I can barely even talk, it chokes me up something fierce :) But I would like to share a few ways He has so richly blessed us, beginning at home.

We have been in our new home since the first of November, we have "owned" (if you can call paying someone else for our home owning, lol) it since the end of July. I don't buy into the "prosperity gospel" but I have read His Promises and I do believe He gave us this desire of our hearts, but in His time. His timing is perfect, always :) We had actually been seeking different opportunities to leave the rent house we were in for various reasons I won't get into right now. We had been playing with ideas and looking around and had even come to see this house. It was an estate sale, the previous owner had passed on and his children weren't able to keep it up and no one really wanted to move into it so they had decided to sell it. We expressed interest, as did others, because of the wonderful price they were asking in comparison with other asking prices. And then my sister needed a place to stay. We were really her only option at the time so she, and sometimes my nephew, came to live with us for a little while. We heard no word, nothing about the house, and started to become sort of concerned. We had seen this wonderful house, with wonderful potential, and I just knew in my heart that we were meant to have this home, I could just feel it. So my sister leaves us and it probably wasn't two weeks later we received a call asking if we were still interested in the house. !!!!!!!!!! I knew God had answered our prayers!! He provided us with what our hearts were desiring, and I really believe it was because we earnestly prayed for it and not because we deserved it. God owes us nothing. But He generously gives us everything. All our praise is due Him. Every time we thought we saw a wall coming close, He has knocked them down. And even though we aren't "cutting edge" or at the same level as the Jones's, who cares? We have so much more than some people...alot of people nowadays. Blessed beyond measure. So much more than the necessities. And I may get ridiculed for the lack of concern I express for much more than the necessities, but that I guess is the nature of the world we are in now.

So I wanted to share a few pictures of the relatively short journey God has allowed us to have. It's a journey I'm sure we're not close to ending, but one that I'm so grateful for thus far, even the hills :)

This was our kitchen before



Our livingroom before





Our entryway, before


Master bath, before



Master bedroom, before



Guest bedroom, before


Utility room, before


I know this is such a long post, but please bare with me...we're almost done!
Now the afters...I know it's not perfect and we've really just begun and I was in the middle of attempting to decorate for CHRISTmas and as much as I would love to be, I'm just not Martha Stewart, people! Oh well :)

Living room, after


Kitchen, after



Entryway, after


Master bath, after paint and new tub/shower, before vanity and new floor


Master bedroom, after



Guest bedroom, after...well, in the middle


Utility room after


I've got a bunch of in-progress pictures too, but I think I've been a bore long enough. I'll be back :)

Neat-o!

How cool is this? A signature for blogs! I've been to some wonderful blogs, many of them are in my sidebar on the right, and they've got wonderful ways that they close their blogs, and they all are so warm and genuine and just seem to fit them. I hate to just leave it blank because these blogs are supposed to be like a conversation, right? You don't talk to someone and then just hang up on them or turn around and walk off...at least not the ones you enjoy talking to, lol. Kidding!! I will admit I've had the urge before but I've never actually been that rude. But I feel funny "signing off"...cheesy even. I'm weird. So I was just tickled pink when I saw this on another blog! How cute :) And it even sorta kinda (when I'm feeling really good and I have an awesome pen) looks like my handwriting, hehehe. Feel free to grab one for yourself!

My new shiny signature :)...

The Simple Woman's Daybook 12-22-08

(got this from peggy at http://thesimplewomansdaybook.blogspot.com/ )

FOR TODAY...

Outside my window...I can see the sun trying to warm the frozen earth

I am thinking... that my mind is much lighter without the baggage of the past

I am thankful for... my husband who gives me more love than I could ever deserve

From the kitchen... just finished clean-up after breakfast

I am wearing... sweat pants way to big for me and a warm thermal shirt

I am creating... not a whole lot

I am going... to study shortly after this

I am reading... and re-reading the instructions for this post thingy to make sure I'm doing it right

I am hoping... our rain forecast this week doesn't result in disastrous roadways

I am hearing... Good Morning America and the washing machine

Around the house... things are quiet and warm

One of my favorite things... the peacefulness of a sunny winter morning

A few plans for the rest of the week: do a little cooking, alot of studying, general housework, being with my dear loved ones and celebrating the birth of the Savior of the world

Here is picture thought I am sharing..



...a picture from our honeymoon, a little over 3 yrs ago.

Down To The Nitty Gritty

I do not miss the workforce. I do not miss getting up at 3 in the morning and having to leave the house by 4:30 to be at work by 5:15 just to slave away for ten hours, tied to a station like an old milk cow, while "the Man" sucked precious time from my life, just so I could line up at the end of the day like an animal off to the slaughter, not feeling much different than such. I didn't feel like I was living for anything but the time clock most of the time. There is, however, one aspect I miss. Alot. Regimen. Start work at 5:30, break at 7:30, work some more, break at 9:30, work some more, lunch at 11:45, work some more, break at 2:15, go home at 4:30. When I was a gym rat I would be home by 7 most evenings, fix dinner by 7:30, in bed by 9:30 (wow...what kind of wife would you call that? I call it "sad"). I was so tired, all the time. But I had my times set and I got things done. Even after working all day long, I got things done.

Now, for the confession. I haven't done such a great job lately. I have been a poor manager of my time and I'm afraid I've made my husband suffer for it. I haven't been a good steward of the time God has given me, after practically begging for it. Why? I don't have a schedule. I started out okay, when I was first laid-off. I got up early, and got to movin'. I partly blame the new bed. Oh my...if you have never slept on a pillow-top mattress...that is a slippery slope. I've become a sleep glutton! But seriously...sloth is not a virtue. And I've been spending way, way, way too much time on the computer. Namely on Myspace. That's another reason I've decided to take my profile off their network. I've been sucked in, like so many others. I joined mainly to keep in touch with family, and that led to browsing other profiles, and time disappears and before I realize it, hours are gone. Wasted. Dashed against the rocks.

So now I am so far behind in my online classes I'm ashamed of myself. My husband is disappointed in me. I am harder on myself than he is on me, so I am extremely emotional about it right now. I love my husband. If I were not a Christian, I would be very close to worshipping him, in my heart. That's just the truth about it. God has blessed me so much with giving me this man as a husband, I can't even express in words how much I love him. He's really awesome. He's a Mr. Steady, for whoever has read "Created to Be His Helpmeet" by Debi Pearl. Father knew I couldn't hold up with a Mr. Command and I'm already kooky enough so I really didn't need a Mr. Visionary. He knew I needed a Mr. Steady. So, I am implementing a schedule, starting Monday. Probably not the best time, seeing as Christmas is next week, but why put off tomorrow what can be done today? Well, not today, and not tomorrow (Sunday, our Sabbath) but the next day. I do feel some accomplishment that I have spent the majority of the day in my class.

I've got my tentative daily schedule written out. I say tentative because I don't know what each day holds, but with the encouragement of the Lord and a little of His Strength, I will accomplish what I can. Prayerfully, all of it. So here goes nothin'

6 AM ~ wake & shower...make coffee

7-7:30 ~ start laundry, if applicable, sweep room(s)...some sort of little tidying chore
start breakfast & prepare DH's lunch

8-9 ~ breakfast & devotion

9:30-12 ~ studying

12:00-1:00 ~ lunch! maybe check e-mails, blogland

2:00-3:00 ~ OFF THE COMPUTER! various housework, gorceries

3:00-4:30 ~ nose to the education grindstone...study!

4:30-6:30ish ~ cook & have dinner
clean-up & dishes

8:00-9:00 ~ study

10:30 ~ bedtime

I plan to make a couple copies of this, if necessary, and put the up in a couple of places. I gotta get back into a productive groove or...I don't even want to think of the consequences.

Words of Love

"Rejoice in the Lord always: and again I say, Rejoice. Let your moderation be known unto all men. The Lord is at hand. Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you." ~~Philippians 4:4-9

My first post, my "mission statement"

I chose "forever student" as the title of my blog for obvious and maybe not so obvious reasons. I am always learning new things and generally love these lessons. I also seem to be literally a perpetual student. Right now I am working on a certification for medical transcription that has the mind-blowing progress of a herd of turtles. Before this I was in nursing school for about 6 months when the money ran out. Before that I was enrolled at a community college for "general studies", I had wanted to be a teacher but that got derailed along the way. Before that was high school. Sometimes I don't feel like I've accomplished much in these 26 years. But I still have many many more to go, if the Good Lord is willing. But should He take me home tomorrow, I'll be okay with that too ;)

The reason I am starting this blog, apart from the inspiration of many of my sisters-in-Christ, is to help keep myself accountable and to get away from another "online networking community". I have a "space" that is "my" own already, but it really isn't mine. It's basically become a billboard for things and people I do not feel comfortable seeing as a woman who disdains immodesty and blatant advertising of all things sexually immoral. So, I am creating a space that is truly mine, where I can edit what I want and what I do not want on it. And a place to share my heart and thoughts from time to time. Even if it is just for myself to see. And pictures! I love pictures :)

So, my little blog spot may not be exciting, it probably won't ever be flashy or cool as the ones I love visiting, but I'll share with you the ones I do enjoy. They do my heart much good, and I always seem to be learning things from them. And isn't that part of the journey? :)