forever student

Spring is here!!

2011-04-14T09:40:00.002-05:00

Yes!!! Finally! I know it's been spring for a few weeks now, if you follow the calendar. But, if you follow the plants and warmth, I think maybe the rest of the countryside has finally caught up to the dates ;) And I am so glad!! It gives my heart such a warmth to see everything green and blooming again. The new life outside our home just magnifies the joy I feel with the new life growing within me! Words simply cannot express how utterly amazed and blessed I feel, it feels as if my heart would explode just trying to put it into words!! We went back to the midwife and had an ultrasound last Friday, April 8th, and learned that God has blessed us with a little boy! Yay!! We would have been overjoyed no matter what the Lord decided to give us, but my husband did breathe a sigh of relief when we found out. We have some generous friends that also have little boys, but have outgrown many baby items and have blessed us with those items. So now we have lots of clothes and blankets just awaiting a sweet little bundle of boy to be in them :)

I also got to experience a new feeling this morning. I was laying in bed after I woke up, and it's become a routine for me to simply lay there for a little while and rest my hands on my stomach about the area that our baby might be. I have been feeling little movements from time to time, from what I believe to be the baby. Well, he must be getting stronger and stronger every day, because this morning I was actually able to feel him moving around under my hands! Oh what a feeling!! And, we have decided on a name for our sweet little guy: Maddox Dale :) OH, we can hardly wait to meet him!! Here are a couple shots of our sweet little guy:

Can you see him looking at us?? ;)

I ask, if anyone should read this and feel so inclined, to say a little prayer for my nephew Micheal. He underwent an operation this morning to correct a mild case of hypospadias. The surgery went well and he is recovering now at Vanderbilt. I know it's hard for his momma to see him in such a helpless state, but once he is all healed up he won't remember a thing, and for that I know we are all thankful. I hope everyone has a wonderful day!!

2011-03-14T10:52:00.002-05:00

Well, here it is finally March...again another month since an entry here, and here I thought I was getting better at this! ;) And what a dreary March day it is! Technically, it is still Winter, despite what the daffodils and trees with their beautiful blooms try to tell me. At least by man's counting it is...and who is to say that's even correct...if nature declares it warm enough to bud up and wake from a long nap, wouldn't it be so? But I can't really complain. We have had some wonderful weather lately, and the week's forecast looks just as lovely in a couple of days...at least it isn't still giving us snow and ice, unlike several other states! So, here's another lesson in contentedness...soon enough I'll be cranking the AC and wishing it were chilly March again ;)

Sometimes I come by my own blog just to have a look at the little "baby counter"...sometimes I laugh at how silly it seems to watch this animation that represents our little Bean bounce around. Is that morbid of me? Surely that isn't really how it's happening in the womb, right? At least there has to be a softer landing what is depicted in the pretend womb, right?? The poor little pretend baby is just getting smacked around over there! *sigh* Anyway :) We're scheduled to go back to the hospital for the "Big Revealing" ultrasound on April 8th...I can hardly wait!! I did get to hear the heartbeat at last month's midwife visit and little Bean was just a chugging along at 150 bpm...such a sweet sound to my ears!! Not feeling any movement yet, but from what I understand, it could be another couple of weeks before I do. I'm just beginning to show some too! I started out with a little bit of padding, so I think when I really start showing then I'll probably look a little farther along than I really am being as I am already carrying a little more weight out front. But I haven't gained more than a couple pounds just yet, which is good! I'm trying to eat healthy and enough, but I haven't just been gorging myself...the nausea to begin with helped that immensely! Oy!

And speaking of Spring...I finally got our seeds and chicks ordered! I'm hoping the seeds arrive any day now and the chicks should be here the second week in April. I'm super excited!! I haven't had much luck with starting seeds indoors before, so I'll be trying a different method this time and praying for the best! I still need to get out there and do some work on the chicken coop, once it dries up just a bit and the temps rise some...hopefully later this week. We didn't get the outcome we had hoped for with the dog situation...nothing more was done about it other than her paying a small fine and court costs...no restitution for the animals killed, nothing done about the dogs. So, we'll be stocking up on some ammo and taking care of it ourselves, if it comes down to that, which I'm afraid it will. Once a dog has the taste of chicken blood, they're ruined. Which is really sad, because I hate to put down any animal, especially when I know that it's someone's pet. But, if it has to be done, it has to be done. And, with our child on the way, I won't be risking any aggressive dog behavior as these have exhibited. Someone's pet is not worth that and we won't be made prisoners of our own home because of someone else's negligence. But, that's enough of that subject.

My heart has been heavy for Japan...I can't imagine what those people are going through...the devastation they have suffered. I know that's a country that is much more prepared for these sort of things than we are, but I don't know that anyone could prepare for something of that magnitude! And the nuclear risks now looming...please be in prayer for them. I know it's a world away, but when God's children hurt I believe He feels it, and I know there are many of His children over there. It's so hard to think of what might happen without warning...even so, Lord Jesus, come! Would you be ready to go if the earth opened up here or wherever you are? The Bible tells us that our lives are like a puff of smoke, a vapor, that vanishes...we truly are like the grass that is green one day and withered the next...where would you end up if it came time to go today? None of us knows when our name will be called, or the ones that we love; is your house in order? I pray that if you do not know that security and peace that ONLY having a relationship with Jesus Christ brings, that you would not wait until things got really bad...because it might be too late. Hard times are upon us, please don't wait until then to seek Him and rely upon Him. He is waiting for you to call upon Him, you don't have to be perfect to come to Him...He will take care of that Himself. You just have to cry out to Him. Won't you trust Him today?

Some of the Goings-On...

2011-02-01T11:54:00.002-06:00

Hello Friends! I know it's been a while, and so much has been going on, that I thought I might try to catch things up a little. It's hard to believe it's already the second month of 2011! Seems the days leave us quicker the longer I live :) And how about this weather?! Never have I seen so much snow in such a small amount of time here...gotta love that global warming, huh?lol And folks around here get so riled up over some white stuff, as if our complaining is going to change a thing about it. I say it would do us all more good to try and be happy that we have the sight to see it and that we have a home to escape the elements...there are so many that are not so blessed as we are! Haiti and Australia come to mind...but we did have some nice temperatures, for January, towards the end of the month. And today we have strong winds, rain and thunder! Never a dull moment.

But, onwards. What's been going on lately around here? Well, aside from the "You might as well laugh about it" weather, there's been some changing of things around the homefront. Some good, some not so good. Sadly, I'll be starting from scratch (no pun intended) with my hens. We have some not-so-considerate neighbors with a few dogs that have acquired a taste for warm birds. There were 3 of them, that I am aware of, that were in on the act, and they managed to break through the chicken wire of my coop and had themselves a nice buffet in the middle of the afternoon a few weeks back and we heard nary a sound. That is my biggest complaint about living in a home made of cinderblocks...the sound insulation can work against us at times. We had issues with this neighbor before when her dogs came after my sweet rooster while he was patrolling our own yard. See, I didn't clip his wings, because he was simply too good...never once showed aggression to me, and would even come and FETCH me when he was finished with his walkabout. Boy he was a sight! :) He never left our yard and was so well-behaved that I hated to take that privilege from him. But, as they say, no good deed goes unpunished, and the dogs came after poor Deuce and destroyed him. All the evidence led straight to their yard. We had called the law, not because I wanted to press charges or anything, but the dogs had cornered Deuce on top of our car and subsequently left scratches all over the sides of the car. We simply wanted to make sure that was on record, should things turn ugly...it is simply nature for predators to destroy prey, but the car was not something DH wanted to simply sweep under the rug.

We tried to be kind with her, I never asked as for retribution for Deuce. He was a rooster, after all, and not a layer. Nor were my hens the kind to go broody. It was right after our terrible flooding last May and her home had been destroyed in it...I simply felt I had no right to demand money from her, we only wanted her to be more respectful and keep her dogs up. We, even the officer handling the event, were under the impression she would be removing the dogs from her property, but that never happened, and so things are going a course I never wanted to see. Sadly, after having been found out by the officer as not abiding by the agreement, and after the last attack on my hens, and several other problems we have had with the dogs, we will be going to court over the matter at the end of the month. I am really really REALLY not looking forward to this, but this neighbor has abused the patience and kindness of several others close by and this seems to be the only recourse we have to get her attention. It seems it has, late as the action may be, as she has just recently put up some kenneling for the 3 dogs. I don't blame the dogs, they're simply doing what they're wired for, and from all indications they were probably pretty hungry already. I feel bad for them, actually. But, hopefully, this will be remedied after this month and we will never have another issue with them.

So, I'll be ordering chicks in the spring, and as the weather gets warmer I will be repairing and reinforcing the coop, so that hopefully this won't happen again! I am trying to decide on getting some meat birds as well as layers. Murray McMurray has some lovely selections and I am leaning toward the meat and layer combo right now...they send out rainbow layers in that combo and I would LOVE to have some more Easter Eggers. I am almost ready to order seeds too. I'm trying not to go overboard, as I am the one who does the gardening and will likely be getting rather large come harvest-time! :) It is really hard to prioritize when you want to do it all!LOL

And the best part of what's been happening! Last Thursday we got to have our first peek at this sweet little child!! I don't know how I managed to keep it all together, but it was beautiful. I have to admit that I was a little concerned at first because there wasn't any movement. But as soon I saw that beautiful little light flickering like mad, I felt alot better. Our little bean had a good, strong heartbeat at 167 bpm and was so calm during the whole process. They say a child's personality begins to from even in the womb, and if that's the case, we may have a laid-back little one on the way! I'll go back at the end of this month for another check-up and then hopefully in March we'll learn if we should start looking for things in pink or blue! Oh, we also got baby's first pictures done that day as well :) From the measurements that day, we're now looking at the end of August to meet this precious little one. I am so excited, and still so humbled at all of this. I do alot of weeping :) Well, I guess that's all I have at the moment. Hope you all have a blessed week!!

The line is where the heart was located in the picture above.

A good shot of our "little Bean". I know peanut is the usual term used, but for some reason Baby reminded me of a bean, lol. So, little Bean it is for now :)

The Simple Woman's Daybook, for January 4, 2011

2011-01-04T09:22:00.006-06:00

FOR TODAY, January 4, 2011

Outside my window...We have a typical cloudy January sky in Tennessee...boy does it look cold!

I am thinking...a million thoughts, all at once...so much to be thankful for, to look forward to, to learn!

I am thankful for...the tiny life God is knitting together inside me, and His mercy and forgiveness of my doubt.

From the learning rooms...I am learning more about this little gift...what they are "growing" this week, trying to learn more about just being as healthy as I can be for this little one.

From the kitchen...I had the last pancake from last week, reheated, and a banana so far...I'm sure there'll be something else soon!lol

I am wearing...my p.j.'s still...

I am creating...well, not alot on my own. But what GOD is creating...oh wow!!

I am going...to see a friend today, then go buy some chicken feed for my ONE hen...ugh. More about that later though.

I am reading...a couple different things on pregnancy. One is "What to Expect..." and a few little magazine sort of things from my sister and midwife.

I am hoping...that little one is growing the way they should be and that God will protect them until we can hold their precious little body in our arms.

I am hearing...the garbage truck. It's not as loud as it usually is, since we don't have a full garbage bin for them to empty.

Around the house...things are quiet, as they typically are this time of day.

One of my favorite things...right now is beef! I just can't seem to get enough of it lately, lol.

A few plans for the rest of the week: Finishing up a research paper, taking down the scant decorations I have up from Christmas, some cleaning.

Here is a picture for thought I am sharing...
A picture my husband took while we were on our anniversary trip to the Smokey Mountains.

Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean: wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.
Psalm 51:7

BIG NEWS!!!!!!!

2010-12-29T19:31:00.003-06:00

I had a blood test done on Christmas Eve and my first prenatal visit is tomorrow afternoon. To say I am excited is an understatement! Thank you, thank you, thank you for all the prayers! God finally said YES!

Guess who decided to show up "early"!

2010-10-29T10:33:00.010-05:00

I say "early" because we weren't entirely sure of the actual due date to expect him, but her physician recommended she set up a c-section date, just in case. My sister so wanted to attempt a natural birth with Micheal, because her first son, Cain, was an emergency c-section. Cain's umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck, essentially strangling him and sending his heart rate way down every time she pushed. So, she had hopes for this birth to be natural, but the doctor on-call (hers was out of town this week) recommended this as being easier for the baby, given her insurance situation. So, another c-section it was. Mommy and baby got to go home yesterday, and I can't wait until I get to hold this sweet little fella again. He is beautiful beyond words and these pictures simply don't do him justice. Some of them are blurry, but his expressions are simply precious. Enjoy!

Micheal Ryan Watkins
Born at 7:06 p.m.
October 25, 2010
5 lb 15 oz, 19 inches long

He didn't like this "binky", it was too big for him!

I could just melt :)

And so alert!!

"Do you know how much Aunt Maymay loves you, Micheal?"

Uncle Justin & Micheal

Uncle Jamie (my dh) and Micheal...doesn't this look good on him?LOL

My dad (Pappaw) and his youngest uncle, Jeremy

Pappaw and Uncle Jared

Nana Nancy (our step-mom) and Micheal

What a precious gift God gives in the newness of a baby!!

The Simple Woman's Daybook, for October 25, 2010

2010-10-25T11:15:00.003-05:00

FOR TODAY, October 25, 2010

Outside my window...there are a few rays of cheery sunlight trying to peek through the rain clouds. It is a beautiful scene as the rays dance with the autumn leaves that remain on their branches after last night's storms.

I am thinking...I have so far to go in my walk to become a woman who represents her Lord Jesus in her life. But, don't we all?

I am thankful for...the rain from last night (we have been so very dry up on the hill) and for God's protection from the most severe of the storms.

From the learning rooms...I am nearing the end of my class!! I have 5 grades left to make and can almost see the finish line!

From the kitchen...nothing this morning. I will probably have a "fiber" bar and a banana, but it is just me this morning, so no cooking.

I am wearing...my p.j.'s still...

I am creating...not much lately. I am concentrating most of my time to the class and am really really ready for it to be done! I am still doing some cross stitching, and did recently finished up a little thing for the kitchen.

I am going...to be an AUNT once again in a couple of weeks!! Oh yeah...I haven't told y'all yet, have I?lol....

I am reading...nothing at the moment...boy, I'm kind of dull lately, aren't I?LOL

I am hoping...everything goes well with the surgeries that are coming up. Next week is going to be a busy one!

I am hearing...the final spin of the washing machine kick in. It never ceases to amaze me how much dirty laundry 2 people can make in one week!

Around the house...things are quiet, as they typically are this time of day.

One of my favorite things...baby clothes! We have some generous friends who have given us clothes for the baby coming soon (not mine, yet) and I have loved washing them up and folding them.

A few plans for the rest of the week: Typing up the rest of the practice transcripts for the class, working on the guest (catch-all) bedroom and repainting it a color that doesn't leave your retinas crying for mercy, thinking up dishes to fix for Thanksgiving...yep, it'll be here soon!!

Here is a picture for thought I am sharing...My precious nephew and I taking a picture of his mom (my sister, who was taking a picture of us, lol) while at my mother's this week. God bless that little sweetheart :)

Catching up...

2010-09-12T13:26:00.003-05:00

When I said I would be back soon, I meant sooner than this! But I think I might have "jinxed" myself by thinking that. I hope I can remember all the things that have been going on since before summer began, but I'm not promising anything. Right now I have my web page toolbar crammed with blog posts I would like to read, and many more to skim over, and am enjoying the beautiful piano music from a friend's music player and basking in the peace I feel at this moment. I am so terribly inconsistent and easily distracted in so many areas of my life and, sadly and inexcusably, this includes my spiritual life. If you feel so compelled, I would appreciate any prayers for this. It catches up with me every time...you would think I would have learned by now. I am so negligent in just sitting down and studying God's Word. I get good, healthy snacks and nibbles from my blog/Facebook friends, but rarely do I sit down and actually indulge in the feast in my own home. And I am becoming malnourished and I can feel it. My witness as His child suffers and I become so susceptible to stumbling when I should know better. Disobedient pride is crippling and I hate when I have it. But thankfully He does not leave me as quickly as I seem to leave Him so often. Out of all His sheep, I feel like the most foolish one. No smart lamb would leave their Shepherd willingly, yet still He gently-but firmly-draws me back in before I can fall down into the pit. I repent and He wipes the tears of shame away. I am thankful, so very deeply thankful. It is a feeling of wretchedness when I realize how I have wandered...never all at once, but just little steps at a time, until I realize I am tripping in the dusk away from His light. Our pastor preached a good word this morning, and the worship with other saints was balm to my soul. May He continue to draw me closer, and may He speak to you what you need to hear from Him. I praise HIM for all He is and Who He is to me, even though I surely will never ever deserve an ounce of it. May His Holy Spirit stir us and spur us on as never before, may we not grow weary in well-doing. I love you, my friends. May He bless you today, and every day, until His glorious appearing again.

.....might it be a post???

2010-08-27T20:15:00.002-05:00

Hello friends! I apologize for the brevity of this entry, and for the length of time I have been away. But, I wanted to let you know that, should you still read my postings, I will be back with more in a while. I have several things to share, some good and some not so good. Until then, may God bless and keep you.

A Busy Day!

2010-03-27T19:30:00.005-05:00

Hey y'all! It's your favorite drama blog-queen back again! Hahaha. Okay, I admit...I suppose I can be sort of a drama llama at times. I'm working on it...I am way too blessed to be so depressed about things that I really don't have too much control over. Sure, I could "take the reins" and push to have things done that could make it appear I am in charge...but seriously? When you get right down to the nitty gritty I have about as much control over it as I do in the seasons and the rising of the sun. And that's OKAY. So, I'll just appreciate and try to be happy for folks who are experiencing things that I hope for our little family here. Hopefully soon I can expound on what I mean a little deeper, but right now that's all I need to say.

It has been kind of busy around here lately and I am glad for it! Some people seem to have that wonderful ability to keep going all year long, but I'm pretty sure if I had been created an animal I would have been a bear. I very nearly hibernate in the winter until Spring and her warmer weather shows up. We also live in what I call a "hobbit house", or a basement house as normal people refer to it. Our living room, kitchen and laundry room are the only rooms in the house that aren't surrounded by dirt with the kitchen and living room having the only full-size windows. I feel like that probably contributes to my hermit nature in the cold months. Oh well :) We have a home and food to fill our bellies and heat to keep us warm and Jesus in our hearts. I am so thankful, and that is an understatement. I am humbled by His goodness and mercy and am embarrassed by how selfish I can be at times. Life is GREAT and I deserve NONE of it.

My online class has been moving along rather well! I am kind of surprised at how well I am actually doing in it. As of right now I am a little more than halfway through and have an average of 91. Hopefully I can bring it up a few points, but I am passing so far!! I may end up slowing down a little bit; with the weather warming up I would like to spend some time outdoors in the yard on days I can, so I'll probably be tweaking my daily routine some.

Speaking of the outdoors, we spent ALOT of time there today. I LOVED EVERY MINUTE OF IT!! Well, most of it. Last year was the first year we had a "real" garden. It went well, I thought, all things considered. I learned a few things and got my feet wet. We ended up having enough squash and tomatoes and okra to eat fresh and a bit extra to freeze, but not a considerable amount to can and put up. So this year I wanted to make our plot bigger and see if I could plant a few different things and try to put some up.

This was our plot(s) last year

This is the beginning of this year's

We're using old railroad ties for our beds and opted for the raised bed because under the topsoil in our yard we have chert rock. Last year we had 4 ties and this year we expanded it by 3. Looking back I wish we had gotten one more and made it square instead of that odd 5-sided thing we have now (hexagon?) but our tie-supplier is a little longer a drive off than we had time for today. I am debating on buying one more...maybe we will try it like this and add another next year, lol. That's about as often as I want to move these things in a year!! Thank you Lord, for giving me a strong husband!! I love him so! I would also like to plant some "looking" plants. You know, those that you plant just because they are nice and make your yard pretty. Unless the Lord comes soon, I don't see us relocating any time soon. I would like for our home to reflect this reality. That means *GASP* making our house a little more like a real home. A work in progress ;) We have some flowers that have been blessing us this spring and the last that were planted by a previous owner, but I would like to plant a few more pretty plants that I really enjoy.

Here are some examples of already existing beauties: please forgive the drabness...not everything has jumped on the spring bandwagon yet ;)

We have some lovely trees/bushes:

We have a larger plum and some other tall tree to the left of what is in this
picture and another plum to the right of the shot...foresight would be
handy when I take pictures ;) This shot has a plum tree, azalea bush & what I think
is a tulip poplar. You can see we also have some cheery daffodils blooming and
some lilies coming up.

Another shot of the same line of trees/bushes from a
different angle

Some daffodils around Gunner's tree and this bright, bold hedge-thing,
lol. Please forgive the ugly garbage can situation...I also cleaned the
shed out today.

At the corner of the house is a smaller azalea bush.
Haven't decided if I'll keep it there or not...

Ahhhh...color :) Sorry, I couldn't resist! This was last summer.

And the lovely flowers:

daffodils and lilies

lilies up top...not sure what that thing is at the bottom left of the brick wall

Irises waaay in back to the right, and two more of those mystery plants...

Irises around the mailbox

Waaaay back there are some more irises

So, that's what is already there. I have some gladiola and peony bulbs to plant and I have a "tulip kit" started that I bought from JoAnn's earlier this month. I didn't know it took 16 weeks for them to sit...is it possible to put them out and they grow properly? I also have some areas already planned to plant in, just not sure what exactly to plant. I would post more pictures of the area, but this post is already waaaaaaaay tooooooooo looooooooooooong! And I am bushed!! Hope you all have a great Sunday!!

Oh, To Hear the Pitter Patter!!

2010-01-08T22:45:00.005-06:00

This will probably be one of those rambling posts. "Stream of Consciousness" they call it? So get ready...

This is a topic I think about alot...possibly too much. I have so many different ideas...emotions over this. I know God alone is perfect, He has a perfect plan, and His timing is always perfect. But I also know that not everyone is called to be everything. Some women do not become mothers. For whatever reason, they never experience that pitter patter of little feet. I'm just going to flat out honest. I DO NOT want to be that woman!! I do not!! I want to experience a womb full of life, the excitement of wondering what that little one might become. I want to give birth. I want to hold and love a child that has features like my husband and me. I want to play with, and help grow a child into loving God. I want to kiss boo-boos till they are better and make peanut butter sandwiches and cut them into pieces small enough for little hands. I want to wipe the mud off chubby cheeks and marvel at the creepy crawlies they find in the yard. I want to be a mother...so very very much. I have cried so many tears. I am sobbing as I type this. I have such a deep, deep desire that I can't articulate...and I have tried. Almost a desperate feeling.

I am only 27. This September I will be 28. I know, typically, I have many years more. I have only been off birth control methods since October of 2007, and yet... I have been off them for nearly 3 years now...it's been 3 years, Lord...please? Pretty please? I feel like Hannah, crying out to her God. Lord, can You hear me?? I can see why the priest thought she was under the influence of something else, if what I feel is close to what she felt that day in the temple. Is it idolatry to want something so badly that you think about it more days than not? Is it possible to want it too much? I can hear another voice...be content with your station now. Bloom where you're planted. A season for all things. It must be in the plan somewhere...why else would I desire it so much? I cannot believe that God would allow me to have such a strong desire and a love so deep for a little person I don't know, and yet deny me the opportunity to ever love that person.

I have a well-meaning aunt who has shared with me her doctor's name and clinic. They specialize in IVF (in-vitro fertilization) treatments for women wanting to get pregnant, and she has experienced two successful pregnancies with this route. One pregnancy resulted in twins, and we love all three of these children very much. My husband and I have visited their website, and talked about it. Now, I will not speak for any woman but myself. I cannot do this. By all I can see, they take at least one egg (maybe more?) and fertilize it with DH's sperm. I firmly believe that life begins at conception. I know our separate "contributions" have potential for life, but without their joining together, neither can become a person. That's simply how God designed it. I also believe His Word and He knits us together...it isn't a random act. So the idea that there would be essentially more than one life created outside of my body, but possibly only one going back into my body, simply does not sit well with either of us. And the expense...for something that has no guarantee. We could not justify that method. My heart says there are too many children in this world with no one to love them, than for us to spend that sort of money on a method that is, quite honestly, unnatural. And, I will put this as delicately as I can, the means for retrieving my husband's "contribution"...I cannot stomach. Call me what you want. So, IVF is out of the discussion.

Fertility drugs? I have not ruled them out. Granted, I don't know alot about them right now. I believe there are risks associated with them, right? My aunt has shared some of her experience taking such drugs to encourage egg production for the IVF she underwent, and there are definitely risks with it...but I don't know that I would need them if we didn't take the same route she did. Does that make sense? I am not against further investigation to see if there is a medical reason we have not conceived, or if it simply is not time for us yet. I am aware that my body may be working fine and it could possibly be an issue with DH's body. I am really struggling with surrender, I think. I call myself "quiverful" in the sense that I want to let God determine our family size, and not us, but what comes to mind most of the time is simply not using birth control to keep a family small. I rarely think about the aspect of trusting Him in the "smallness" of our family too. It is almost like saying..."Lord, I trust You, but only if You want to make our family HYUGE...now if You decide not to give us ANY, I don't want that part...I just want the HYUGE-ness." Selfish, I know. But this is about honesty, right? I go back to wondering why I would even feel what seems like a gap in our life, if we were not meant to have any.

I attended a women's weekend at a church not long ago...back in late October I think it was. There was a woman who came and spoke and her words left me in tears. She voiced the very same things I was feeling...she and her husband had been married for several years and yet they were still childless. She suffered with endometriosis and several miscarriages. She cried out to God and her words matched my heart perfectly. She says God spoke to her and simply said "I called you to be a mother. I haven't called you to be pregnant". She knew then they were meant to adopt, and God saw them through it and brought a beautiful little boy into their lives from the Ukraine (I believe is was the Ukraine...I was kind of scatter-brained that morning, but it was in that area if I am wrong). Not very long after that, even through her medical condition and knowing she would probably never carry a child and give birth, she became pregnant and had another little boy! This beautiful sister is now pregnant with their FOURTH blessing! I say all that to express my hope. I don't know what God has in store...but my heart is open and I have a great feeling of compassion to orphaned children. Shucks, I simply love children. Love them. They could have great parents, and I would still love on them, lol. I am praying that He would reveal the course for us, through my husband, because I know where my heart stands in it.

I feel like a child who really does not want to throw a tantrum, because I know it won't do me any good, but I feel that tantrum coming on. I guess you could say I throw a little one about once a month now. I can't hide my disappointment from God when "the company" shows up, so I don't even try anymore. Why can't I just be thankful that part of me works? It didn't use to...

Another aspect I have considered...my class. There is a desire (though not as strong as the other) to pay down our debt. Hopefully that will happen when I finish this course I am taking. Maybe God is waiting for me to finish my class? Maybe He knows that if I were to be pregnant and not be done with this class, it might never get done because I am just that scatterbrained? Maybe He's trying to make it easier on me (though I know life is rarely easy, especially for His people) and I'm just trying to cram everything in at once. Maybe. I guess I will have to wait and see. I will have to wait on Him.

He is still God and I am not. He is good, and I will praise Him in this storm, even if it is a broken hallelujah.

Love My Furbabies

2010-01-08T22:44:00.009-06:00

this past summer, my husband and I had discussed getting a cat to make sure the mice didn't become a problem with the feed in the shed. We had decided that we would have just one, a male if at all possible, and that he would be an "outside" pet. So, I kept my ears open for mouser opportunities to present themselves. So, along comes August. My husband calls me one day and tells me he has found a kitten. It is at his mother's office (she is the office manager for a local hospice service) and was I interested? Well, of course I said yes, so he says he will let her know and she can bring it by the house on her way home from work. I happened to be out at the time she arrived, so she and my husband were on the front porch waiting for me with a rather odd look on their faces. Comes to find out, the one kitten in the box the nurse gave her (a nurse took the original 3 kittens from a patient who couldn't care for them any longer and saved them from further games of "toss the kitty" from some mean little boys) turned out to be 2-a boy and a girl. They couldn't have been more than 4 weeks old, they were so small. So, MIL offered to take one back the next morning if we wanted. God gave my husband a kind heart and so we decided to keep them both at least until they were older and bigger, we just couldn't' bear to split them up after that! The rest is history, as they say :)

I would like you to meet Silvio and his sister, Sissy. No, there is not great meaning behind their names. Silvio, when we first received him, had lots of crazy white hairs that gave him a silvery look from a distance. And Sissy, well, she meowed. Alot. She still does, but not to the extent that she once did. So, she's our little sissy crybaby, lol. Yeah, I'm not known for my profound maturity ;) Enjoy!

September. They have grown some, their eyes have turned from blue to green, and they have made themselves quite at home.

October. They were finally getting a taste of the outdoor life. They have indeed grown into their ears and eyes, I think :) However, Silvio has lost all but a few of the white hairs that gave him his silvery sheen. Ah well, he is still a charming fellow.

Apparently, I didn't take any of them in November, but by December they had grown to be just a bit bigger than poor Gunner. He takes it all in stride, though now they can give back to him as much as he gives them ;)

January 2010...their first encounter with snow

Behind as usual :)

2009-12-30T22:38:00.004-06:00

Hello everyone :) I trust the holiday season was good to everyone and you all had wonderful memories made that you will cherish the rest of your days! I thought it was time I posted something...I have all but reached the conclusion that I won't be able to post regular updates or things of much substance, I guess I'm just not the blogging superwoman I would like to be :) Oh well. There are other things in life I could be really successful at, I supposed, haha. But I will at least try to be better about keeping up with everyone.

There have been a few things going on around here since the last time I posted in November...wow, has it truly been that long ago?? I guess it has, but is surely doesn't feel as if it should be! Thanksgiving was blessed, Christmas was joyful, and New Year's was...trying. I have alot of clutter in my home as well as my heart that needs to be cleaned out. That is one of my New Year goals (resolution is such a dirty word, lol), to straighten up my heart, my priorities, refocus on the goals that I hoped for at the beginning of last year and to truly remove things that had crept up to a place that only God should have dominion in. I have allowed myself to become such a silly woman in many ways, and it should not be. I have begun a list of books that other godly (or by all appearances they are) women have read and recommend as edifying literature. There is work to be done and I am tired of wasting my life following things that will not matter in the end.

I have so much to sort out, so much to pray about, and maybe to just let go of. There are things I don't understand, things I don't know what to do with, things I just want to throw my hand up and say "I give up" over. And yet, I feel a great desire to pursue them. I will most likely be sharing more about these things that weigh heavy on my heart through this blog, because this is my journal ( I never could keep up a proper schedule when I put it on paper either). So much I do not understand, and yet what I do understand is that God loves me. The Creator of the universe and all in it cares for me. And I have to believe that these things, these good things, that I long for incredibly have to be there because HE put them there. And if He did, why would He not allow me to realize these desires? So, I do believe I will get to experience at least some of these aspirations. I just do not know when. Patience...boy do I need it!

I have been focusing more on my class. It appears that when I take the time and apply myself that I do very well with it. Huh...imagine that ;) I have been incredibly lazy with it and that is a big regret. And part of me wonders if, because of my laziness with this, that hasn't put a hold on better things? Well, it's time for me to put on my big girl breeches and keep my promises. And, if things go as planned (which I am not really holding my breath about...apprehensive hope, if you will) I will finish this course. And if things go as planned, I will be working from home, which is the dream I had when this class began. And if things go as planned, I will be able to help pay down most of our debt (another big dream for me) and lighten this dark cloud that tries to rain on us from time to time. However, whatever happens, I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that Jehovah Jireh WILL provide our NEEDS, because He has always been faithful.

I am trying to pay more attention to my physical health. I have been gluttonous in my behavior over the past few months-more so than before-and I think it has finally started taking an obvious toll on my well-being. I haven't felt well for time now. I've been sluggish, my complexion hasn't been very good, and I have put on a few more pounds. Not good. Now, I do not believe anyone ought to put too much emphasis on any one thing, or we risk making it an idol. But this is something that needs to be fixed, especially if I intend on being active. Bad health is not an asset. And, should the Lord ever bless us with children, I want to be able to keep up with them! I keep reminding myself that healthy does not always equal thin, and thinness does not always equal health. My husband's doctor recommended some time ago that he try the SouthBeach diet to help get the weight and some cholesterol numbers a little lower and my hubby did very well with it, so we are taking another swing at it. I am praying I don't have a carb-deprivation induced meltdown this time...I didn't even make it 2 weeks last time we tried it!

One last paragraph :) We have a couple of little additions! Well, they aren't so little anymore. Back in August we took in a couple of black furballs, two kittens who were being used as tossing-toys by some mean children. I have lots of pictures to share...they will likely have their own post :) They're very sweet most of the time and I know you're going to love them! I guess I've rambled on for long enough now. I'll try not to stay away too long. Have a great weekend everyone!!

2009-11-23T12:00:00.004-06:00

November 23rd

FOR TODAY... from Amy's Daybook

Outside my window... it's a typical late November day; kinda gray with a few leaves still holding onto to their branches.

I'm thinking...this is going to be a crazy week...

I am thankful for...dear family friends who are blessing us with venison...I do love venison :)

I am wearing...my pajamas still. Migraines have a way of doing that...

I am remembering...Thanksgivings of years gone by

I am going...to the Mennonite store in a little while, hopefully to find the remaining candies I need to make my little turkeys.

I am reading... nothing in particular at the moment, but I have some things coming up...maybe a new year's resolution?

I am hoping... I don't forget to make some bread and the pies later this week...

On my mind...Oh, wow...my mind is almost like a briar patch of thoughts anymore...all scattered yet tangled together.

From the learning rooms...still working on my online studies. They have changed the learning materials platform so hopefully things go smoother.

Noticing that...where do I start? Should I really get on a soapbox today? Okay, here's a simple one...apparently my migraine is not completely gone...

Pondering these words...<<>

From the kitchen...hopefully some tiny turkeys, some bread, lunch of some kind...I've got a rumbly in my tumbly!

Around the house...things are looking very, um, un-seasonal?lol I need to fix that!

One of my favorite things~Thanksgiving :) The family, the food, the time to just slow down and be with folks you love. Priceless

From my picture journal...

A picture from last year's autumn, but it still resembles our yard this year :) I'm a simple kinda gal, really :)

Well...

2009-11-14T14:43:00.004-06:00

...I figured it was time to crawl out from under my rock and post something. Anything. So, what better to share on my own little piece of blog-o-sphere than a rant. It seems that's what I'm good at lately. Ranting. Unloading. Whether out loud or in my own mind. And maybe I can get some answers. Maybe, just maybe, someone else has gone through this and can share some insight.

Television. I have a hate/only-kind-of-hate relationship with it. I'm talking about entertainment-wise. I completely understand and agree that it can be an excellent tool and aide. I enjoy watching movies from time to time. But what I care to see anymore is few and far between. See, I don't know what you would call it? Conversion? Heart change? Regeneration? Conviction? But most days I want to pull my hair out and scream like a crazy woman. Sex. Violence. Blasphemy. Sex. Lies. Abominations. Sex. Gimmegimmegimmegimmegimme (especially on Saturday mornings...yes, sometimes I have to watch cartoons...nearly 30 years old and still can't get away from it) I feel like a raving lunatic!

Portraying intimacy on the screen has always made me highly uncomfortable...it wouldn't matter to me if the actors were married in real life or not, or if they were fully clothed like Amish people, just the insinuation of an intimate act between two people has made me squirmy for as long as I can remember. Even when I was living an immoral life with no real regard for Christ, I just did not care to see it whatsoever. Even when I was cheapening myself with things of the world, I have always thought it cheapened the act that I knew (though rebelled severely against) ought to be between just one man and one woman. Now, ever since giving that past up to Christ a couple of years ago, it's almost as if it flips a switch when the tone of a program begins to shift to seduction. Skimpy clothing (on men and women) does it to me as well. I don't understand it. I can't say that I have felt this passionately about it before I wandered away from the Lord, but boy, oh boy, it's there now! But obviously I'm the only person it offends.

I don't know what to do, how to handle it. I feel like a mother scolding their child and I'm just tired of repeating myself. It exasperates me that this disgusts only me. And if it does bother anyone else, it isn't so ugly that anything is done about it. The entertainment is more important than godliness. It just makes me cry tears of anguish and sorrow. WHY DOES THIS NOT GRIP ANY HEART BUT MINE!? I want to shake people and ask "WHAT PART OF HOLY DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND??" I am not perfect. God is still working on me and I am still resistant at times. I am a feeble, weak woman apart from God's mercy and love, but as someone who used to think nothing of dancing on bars in drunken debauchery and going home with men I barely knew and for God to do this change in my heart, WHAT is it going to take??? I certainly do not believe people have to go down the dark roads to appreciate or want to seek the road of Life.

And it's not just television. Magazines. Computer games. Comic books. Sometimes (more jokingly than anything) I can't help but wonder why I had not been created a man. Then, I could really preach, lol! I can only pray for God to do a work in the hearts of those who are supposed to be the leaders in the home, because I cannot do it. It is not my place to be the spiritual leader in the home, and I am trying hard to not usurp the authority that is not given to me. I wonder though...would this be considered crossing the line? Could I really post this "prayer" on the telly and get away with it?lol I could go sit in another room when these programs come one, and I would be in a room all alone most of the time. I just don't know anymore. I'm about ready to throw my hands up and just sit in the bedroom all by myself. Rant over. For now.

Still Kicking!

2009-07-13T20:59:00.006-05:00

I'm still alive, though I'm sure it appears that I have kicked the bucket in the blog world. I'm not really that regular of a poster here anyway, but realize that it is very impolite to go a whole month or so without so much as a peep, and in the middle of a testimony, no less!! So, while this is not a continuance of my (His) story, I did want to share a little bit with you of what has been going on around here in the past few weeks.

There have been a couple of weddings in the church that we have been able to witness as Jamie ran the soundboard. They were very lovely and we wish the couples nothing but joy and love for many years to come. This weekend we will attend another wedding, however this one will be especially special because my cousin is the bride! She asked me and I am honored to be able to sing during the ceremony; she requested Butterfly Kisses, so I may need extra prayer to make it though without breaking down :) I have been practicing it at home and have almost mastered imagining her and my uncle without tearing up.

On the garden side of things, everything is green! I love this part of summer, things are so full of life and it seems to happen so quickly that it almost takes me by surprise! I had beans, but not enough at one time to can. They have all but disappeared under the squash now. The okra is starting to come in and we have enjoyed an evening of fried okra. I really enjoy eating it raw as well which is something I had never tried before. We also now have lots of plum jam to enjoy on toast in the morning! My first canning project turned out to be quite yummy. It looks like my next project will be tomatoes, as our Roma and Brandywine plants are becoming weighed down with lots of green beauties. I may not have much to put up this year, but I sure am learning some great lessons, LOL.

My feathered babies are about to experience so major adjusments! Just yesterday I was let in on a major gift that was going to bless somebody greatly! A while back my DH let me purchase what I have been calling our chicken "condo". Compared to the little shack I rigged up with the spare materials and few new pieces we had around here, this is going to feel like a 5-star luxury! At least, it had better... *stern look in the general direction of said feathered babies*...the new accomadations count as sort of a birthday/anniversary deal, lol. This was back in May. So, ever since then, after adding a coat or two of protective paint, the poor chicken condo has been sitting empty; I haven't been able to purchase the fencing materials needed to enclose the area because they are just too expensive at this time. However, I knew something would have to be done soon because the scrap luann paneling I used to build the "Charlie Brown Christmas Tree" of a chicken house is starting to come apart. Yesterday at church I learned about a brother there who was looking to drastically down-size. He wants to get rid of ALL his chickens, housing, materials, feed. PRAISE GOD!!! That's all I can say!!

So, hopefully in a few days, we will be relocating 13 birds and their housing. God does care about the desires of His children.

Well, I think that's about all I have for now. Oh, and maybe a few pictures :)

The chicken coop as it stands now, before moving it here

This is my story, This is my song, Part I

2009-06-13T10:32:00.004-05:00

I have been contemplating doing this for some time now. I have read the testimonies from others in the blogosphere, I have cried tears of joy for their victories in Christ, tears of understanding for the pains of others, tears of anguish for others who have been taken advantage of. I figured it was time I shared my story, because it just might help someone else out there. There is nothing I can do for anyone, but God has done some mighty things in my heart and my life and I know lives can be changed when HE works through His people who are willing to let Him. So, I'm going to attempt to begin at the beginning, or as far back as I can remember. You may want to go get some coffee or a beverage of your choice as this may take a while :)

A word of warning: I used to live in a very dark place and I am going to try to share some of that with whoever will read this. It isn't pretty and some of it could be quite blunt and will deal with a few issues that are of a sexual nature.

I am going to start around the age 5. I have memories from before that, but I will start here because I think this was probably a big factor that shaped my future. I love my family. They have been such a huge factor, outside of my own parents' relationship, in the way I see things. Having the family God gave me, I believe, has given me a strong sense of family. I have so many wonderful memories. But they are not what I would now call a very godly people. I do think they love God, but not enough to respect His name or His day. My precious grandmother was the one who took the children to church; my grandfather had some bad experiences with pastors a long time ago and will not attend because of them. So the discipling was mostly left to my grandmother. They had six sons, my father being the third-born. Well, for whatever reason, attending church was not something my father deemed very important, and to make a long story short, unless it was by my grandmother, and then only when she was warning us about where being bad would get us, was there much talk about God. We were basically being raised like secularists. And it should come as no surprise that if the holy name of our Creator isn't held as sacred, then not much else is. Movie-time would often include times to "cover our eyes" so we wouldn't see the intimate scenes, but that would do nothing for our ears. And there are scenes that have been burnt into my memory between my parents that were humiliating for me to walk in on wherever they decided to "partake" of each other. There were no lessons on how to react properly. So, essentially, aside from the embarrassment I felt during movie time, there were no real factors for me to know what was right or wrong. Children are lost sinners like anyone else, the nature at a young age is still sin nature.

This lack of Christian leadership would lead to many years of struggling within myself, my heart, and years of "make-believing" church. My first "interaction" came when I graduated kindergarten. I remember my uncles had killed a hog (that's when you know it was a big event in the south) and my grandfather's business at the time specialized in buidling farm equipment. I remember there were large metal tubes in the area. This is where I make a plea. Mothers, parents, if you are raising your children to be pure, if you want to spare them from horrible encounters, I beg you, PLEASE know what your kids are doing at all times. Especially if the other children are not being raised in a godly environment. It was in one of these big tubes I had my first "encounter" with anothe very young person. I think the saddest part was that this person was not much older than I was. I don't know how or where or who they learned this behavior from, and because they have passed away, I never will without bringing some horrible things out from others that I have no gaurantee would make any difference. I don't beleive children just pull these things out of the blue, but that they would have learned this from someone else, and that whoever got the whole thing started will have to answer for it eventually. So I don't pursue the answers. I don't need to anymore. Vengeance will be the Lord's and His alone. This experience stirred up unnatural desires. For the rest of my childhood and into my adulthood I would struggle with bisexual tendencies. Now, lest I scare anyone who might have any doubts about their safety around me: I never was one who could just look at anyone any "feel" things about them, of either gender. For whatever reasons, I have never been a visual person in the sense of lusting, it would always have to be a combination of things...later on that combination would more often than not include alcohol or pot. I do, however, feel the pain that men feel when a sister-in-Christ thinks it is just fine to wear clothes that a Christian woman has no business wearing.

I guess I should count that as a sort of difficult blessing, that I feel sort of like an insider to how a man's mind might work and how hard it can be for them to not feel anger towards a woman who would have no more love for their brothers than they do. And in the house of God! That is a soap-box I could stand on for a long time. If you had known me more than a couple of years ago, I would have been preaching, desperately beseeching to myself. I guess I should back up. See, I was "saved" at a young age...I would say around 4th grade or so. As a result of VBS and wanting to please my grandmother whom I looked up to very much, I walked the aisle and was plunged beneath the water. I cannot say that I was truly saved, because my driving need to please my grandmother overtakes any other memories about that day. There was no discipleship that I can recall. This false salvation, as I see it, led to lip service but no real change. I still had the unhealthy relationship with my "sexual" self, as some would call it. I was still shoplifting and occasionally stealing from family members. I still had the hateful thoughts. There was no rebirth; I was unregenerate. There was no hate of all things worldly and unholy and sinful. There was no disgust or shame. I knew these things were wrong because I was going to church and had a Bible, but I felt no real conviction.

So, what happens when you are unregenerate but don't even know it because noone has ever explained it to you? You continue to sin without real conviction. And every now and then, you hear a message or go to a young christian get-together with christian bands and speakers and classes and "get emotion", or as it may have been, a real call to salvation and you rededicate your life. Over and over and over again. I have thought before that perhaps the Holy Spirit had really been calling me to salvation those times before and I even had a re-baptism. You could say I am a double-dipped Baptist. But then I think, no. I'm pretty certain that when the Holy Spirit speaks, you know.

Well, I need to get dressed. Here it is 1 in the afternoon and I am still in my pajamas and I am hoping we can do some organizing here around the house. That requires a trip to Lowe's to see their ogranizer section. And that requires me to not be looking like I look right now :) I will continue my testimony soon, I hope. I apologize as well, I am not the best writer out there and I tend to run-on alot and rambling isn't always easy to read. So bear with me and hopefully I will finish this before Christmas :) I hope this hasn't scared anyone off, I hope God can use this. I know He can and whatever comes out of it will be for His purposes, as scary as it may be to put all this out there.

Until next time...

Honest Scrap

2009-06-12T18:30:00.007-05:00

My dear bloggie sister over at Evening Shade Morning Latte has shared her cute little FYI award with me! This is such a fun little activity, I'm glad to be a part of it and that she thought enough of me to want to know more about me (y'know, aside from my crazy lady-on-the-hill rants I tend to have :] ). So, here we go!

The terms, should you choose to accept:

Thank the person who gave it to you: THANK YOU ESML!! :)
List 10 honest things about yourself: I am not going to promise this won't get messy...
Put the honest scrap logo on your blog.
Thank 7 other bloggers you think deserve this award: I am going to pick a few, but please feel free to join in if you'd like!

Ten things about me you may or may not want to know ;)

I am a military brat; my father was a Staff Seargant before he left the USAF
Because of my military brattiness I have lived in 5 U.S. states (Mississippi, Tennessee, Delaware, Indiana, and Texas) and have very fond but very few memories of living overseas in Germany.
I know a little bit of self-taught guitar, and my senior graduation was a Takamini Jasmine acoustic guitar (not every kid needs a new car!)
I used to wish I was Dr. Dolittle (the old Disney version)
I still have dreams of being like Dr. Dolittle, with a complete menagerie :)
I despise going to movie theatres, even if it is something I really want to see...which hasn't happened in a long time.
When I was a "make-believer in Christ" I dabbled in Wicca, had a fascination with all things occult, played with adultery, and was a near-chain smoker and alcoholic. And that ain't all of it! SEE WHAT GOD CAN FREE YOU FROM!!?
I like being a little bit dorky...
I have a serious aversion to hearing people blow their noses or "hark things up" anywhere near me when I am eating. I have (rather loudly and rudely) told people to leave if they were going to regurgitate their lungs while I was eating.
I love the smell of machinery oil and wood and even animals; it reminds me of my grandparent's home and Papaw's shop.

Now, since I have aired out some of my dirty laundry, I get to pass on the honor! No, you don't have to get personal if you prefer, but I figured my #7 was a victory to share! Please do not feel obligated to do this but if you want to join in, go for it!!

EDIT: I had chosen a few ladies to pass this on to, but after reading another post almost immediately after publishing this first, I have decided to come back and make a change. I am not going to single out a few blogs, for two reasons: 1. I don't want anyone to feel obligated to pass this on, I know life is busy and most of my sisters here are mothers who get little time to themselves and probably don't want to spend their free time doing something to keep from hurting anyone else's feelings. 2. I personally feel bad for just picking out a few and want to save others any grief.

Enjoy!!

Forgiveness and Love

2009-06-05T22:01:00.002-05:00

“A certain immoral woman heard Jesus was there and brought a beautiful jar filled with expensive perfume. Then she knelt behind him at his feet, weeping. Her tears fell on his feet, and she wiped them off with her hair. Then she kept kissing his feet and putting perfume on them.” Luke 7:37,38

She washed Christ’s feet with the tears of grateful love. Jesus had pardoned all her sins, had absolved her from their guilt, and had released her from their power. How natural was the feeling of gratitude, how appropriate this service of love!

The most genuine contrition for sin flows from a sense of its forgiveness. Nothing breaks the heart so thoroughly as the experience of God’s pardoning love, love flowing from a sight of the cross!

Octavius Winslow from “The Disciple Washing Christ’s Feet”

I read this today and cried. "Would He devote that sacred head, For such a worm as I?" I was that immoral woman who could only weep at His holy feet. I was that woman He helped up from the dusty ground despite the Pharisees' stone-clenching hands. I was that woman. I am now that woman who still weeps, because it is so far from my feeble mind's ability to grasp this thing He has done, and continues to do, for me and in me. Thank you, Jesus.

"Thus might I hide my blushing face
While His dear cross appears;
Dissolve my heart in thankfulness,
And melt mine eyes to tears.

But drops of grief can ne'er repay
The debt of love I owe:
Here, Lord, I give myself away-
'Tis all that I can do!"

Where there's a will, there's a way...

2009-05-30T22:39:00.003-05:00

Dear Friends, I would like you to "meet" Papaw.

PRAISE REPORT!!

2009-05-26T20:29:00.005-05:00

GOD is good!!

I realize I haven't been around lately, my bloggy-commitment skills are lacking obviously. I want to apologize for any kind of concern I have caused, but I honestly haven't had the desire to post anything really, save the couple of snippets of information I thought were urgent. But right now I have some wonderful news to report and I just have to share the praises of God!

About a month ago, my grandfather was diagnosed with prostate cancer. The majority of it, I believe, was of the less aggressive type but he had a few cells of what was referred to as the "devil cells". They are the most aggressive and most deadly. He was presented with a couple of options as far as treatment goes, he opted for surgery. Tuesday morning he was admitted into Centennial hospital in Nashville, underwent the procedure (his surgeon was at the top of the list in this area), and by the time DH and I arrived at the hospital (about 12:30-ish) he was in his room resting well. His spirits are high (they are rarely ever down). They are confident all the cancer cells were removed but took a lymph node biopsy to test and be sure.

I am beginning to realize how temporary this world is. Our lives are so short, like dust in the wind, like a moment to our Lord. As a human, I understand this. Death is just another part of the eternal journey we are on. And yet I still dread the day coming for any member of my family. The sorrow of knowing that this person who has been such a constant, almost taken for granted at times, will one day be no more in this plane of existence. I can't even begin to process this, so it gets pushed in the back of my mind until something like this happens. Then it becomes somewhat raw. Reality, if you will :)

BUT TODAY IS NOT A DAY TO BE THINKING ABOUT DEATH!! Papaw is a hard man to keep down!! He is one of 11 children. He has 6 sons of his own, one daughter in Heaven, twenty grandchildren (I think...I lost count!) and 4 great-grandchildren. He is an entrepreneur, and has been as far as I know, his entire adult life. He, with the help of his sons, built a home from the ground up. He farms. He still works every day, even into his seventies. He has had a quadruple heart bypass. People that work or have worked for him call him Pops. And his wife, my Mamaw, is Mom. There are families out there who consider them their own. How great a legacy to leave! How can you ask for a more blessed life? What beautiful people they are. No person is perfect. We all have our blemishes. But Papaw is a gem of a man, and to be admired by many says something about character. I confess that I have even had to fight back feelings of jealousy sometimes! How can you not love this man?

P.S. I wanted so badly to add some pictures of my Papaw with this post, but for whatever reason blogger refuses to load them. So I am going to skip that part before I destroy this laptop.

This is the Gospel.

2009-05-15T20:27:00.002-05:00

I have never been presented with the Gospel in this way. At least not to my recollection, and I think this is something I would remember. Jesus was not a cuddly character. He lived a life of rejection. A life of humiliation. A life and death of unbelievable pain. WILLINGLY!!! I cannot even imagine how it would feel to have my own family reject me to the point of wanting to KILL me. I can't fathom anyone loving me so much that they would subject themselves to that. Thinking about it reduces me to a sobbing wreck. My GOD how could YOU love such scum as me?? I have spat in Your face. I have abused Your name. But GOD. Pour me out Lord, and fill me up with You. I deserve no less than excruciating death. Yet YOU have given me eternal life. I will forever sing YOUR praise. Thank You. Thank You. Thank You.

Beware,beloved.

2009-05-05T09:11:00.001-05:00

Just a few false teachers, wolves in sheep's clothing, who have infected Christianity...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=21YYN2E7xkY

“People tell me judge not lest ye be judged. I always tell them, twist not scripture lest ye be like satan.”
–Paul Washer

Mamaw's Jalapeno Cornbread

2009-04-20T21:18:00.002-05:00

3/4 can of corn
1 cup cooking oil
3 eggs
2 1/4 cup self-rising cornmeal
3 medium jalapeno peppers, chopped
3/4 cup chopped onion
1 1/2 cup buttermilk
1 1/2 cup grated cheese

Mix all ingredients. Pour into iron skillet and bake at 350 degrees Fahrenheit for 1 hour.

This could be a meal in itself and is so so so tasty. Very likely my favorite cornbread of all time. The fact that it's Mamaw's might have something to do with it :)

And I am loving the comments from the last post! So enthusiastic :) but not quite as much as me, hehehe. Actually, I am having to learn restraint with my excitement for things "un-technified" because I think it scares my husband. It's kind of like a weird backwards Green Acres. Oh the stories we will have for our kids one day, LOL

Mrs. B, I love sunflowers! Natasha, you can bet the swing will come in handy this summer...alls I need is a table for the fresh lemonade after the weeding :) I do love our chickens, even if Deuce did punch me in the eye when I tried to put him and his ladies in the cage to share our lawn with them. But I try not to hold grudges ;)

Praise GOD from Whom ALL blessings flow!!

2009-04-18T20:23:00.003-05:00

The past couple of days have been quite busy for us around here. I have a wonderful true story of God's provision for us to share with you, when I am not so sleepy and can give it the brain-power it needs. But I will share with you for now just a few nibbles of the sweetness I have felt from Him this week. It just amazes and baffles me why I should even be blessed so enormously. It just swells so big in my heart that I can hardly stand it.

This pretty insect was enjoying a rest on our little raspberry plant. I was somewhat concerned that he might try to munch on it, so I stared at it quite sternly until it flew away. Guess I told him ;)

A porch swing. It might be the old-fashioned country girl in me, but home just doesn't seem right without one of these. We bought it this morning from the Mennonites on Cedar Creek. DH and I have already given it a good "test swing".

And now, I'd like to introduce you to the newest "members" of our family!

This is Hazel, in front, and Hennie (original, I am not!)

And this is Deuce! Isn't he a handsome fella?
His full name is Lonesome Dove II, given him by his previous keeper, but I like things simple ;)

Those big black timbers? Those are the ones I mentioned in my "8's" post.
Not exactly an enjoyable exercise, but maybe after going through all that it'll be worth it.

With dirt! I added a 10-10-10 fertilizer to it this afternoon. It's forecasted to rain tonight, tomorrow and some Monday, so hopefully Tuesday I can start planting! Hopefully that's enough time in between fertilizing...anyone have any idea how long you should wait before planting?

Until next time, I hope everyone has a beautiful and blessed Sunday!

Crazy 8's!

2009-04-18T19:18:00.004-05:00

I bet you thought I wasn't going to post ever again, huh? No? I guess that was just me :) Well, not only do I have happy things to share, but I now have a happy obligation to do more than one tonight! So, if you ever wanted to get to know more about me, like my sweet sister-friend Kim, here's your chance! :)

Here's the run-down on the 8's:

Mention the person that tagged you.
Complete the lists of 8's.
Tag 8 of your wonderful bloggy friends.
Go tell them you tagged them!

8 THINGS I LOOK FORWARD TO

Seeing my Savior and being with my Father and King FOREVER!
Family reunions. Hey...not all the things you hear about southern families is true.
Being with my DH for the rest of our lives
Being a mommy someday
Adventures with our first vegetable garden
To another beautiful day tomorrow!
Eventually expanding our little flock of chickens
Learning how to be a better servant, cause I'm not so great at it right now...

8 THINGS I DID YESTERDAY

I had coffee too!(lol Kim!) Decaf :)
Moved the 4 200-lb railroad ties all by myself. (this "bigger than acceptable" rear-end comes in handy!)
Played in the dirt with my flip-flops on
Broke one of our 2 eggs for the day
Finally cleaned up the porch
Worked on my cross-stitch
Read Blogs!
Enjoyed getting my "sunnin" in, the old-fashioned way :)

8 THINGS I WISH I COULD DO

See better without my glasses (almost the same as Kim's)
Sew really really well! (ditto for me too!)
Become a super-woman and guarantee my husband I can finish the class before July.
Blink my eyes and be 125 lbs again.
Not worry about my weight so much.
Meet all my blogging friends in real life! (ditto again)
Live with Mennonites for a short time and learn what real "sufficiency" is, lol
Take back the time I wasted chasing what "I" (read: what the world said I ought to) thought was best.

8 SHOWS I WATCH

Biggest Loser ( I'm sure this doesn't help my body image deal)
Super Nanny
18 Kids and Counting
the really good Hallmark shows (example: I'm watching Little House on the Prairie right now)
Andy Griffith
Sorry I don't have more but that's about all the t.v. I cant stand
To be honest, it wouldn't hurt my feelings much if we didn't watch it at all.
I do watch the news and occasionally some FoxNews

8 BLOGGERS TAGGED
I'm tagging people I don't know very well, YET. If you do this please tell me so I can come learn more about you.

Actually, I'm going to skip this part. Not because I want to make anyone mad, but I feel kind of weird picking people out to do things I'm not really sure they'd be comfortable or even have time to do. I personally like doing these, I guess it's probably like my weirdness about not liking to drop in on people but not caring a bit for people to drop in on me. I know...weird.

So, if you see this and take a notion to, you're more than welcome to join me! It was really pretty fun :) Thank you for inviting me, Kim!!

Hallelujah, Praise the Lamb

2009-04-12T07:28:00.003-05:00

From the moment man first disobeyed the Father,
We were then held captive by our sins.
The Law of God demanded a sacrifice
Restoring to Himself His own again.

So the Lamb, His only Son was freely offered,
Atonement for our sins forever made.
He, innocent and holy, still God and God only
Could ransom and redeem us back again.

Hallelujah, praise the Lamb
Hallelujah, praise the Lamb
My heart sings HIS praise again,
Hallelujah, praise the Lamb

So to the cross they carried Him
With all our guilt and all our sin,
The Lamb of God was slain for our transgressions.

And on the cross, those nail-pierced hands
Reached up to God and down to man.
And just as if I'd never sinned, He took me in His arms
Embracing me, He willingly forgave!

For mercy, grace, and love that knows no bounds.
Though guilty and condemned, I now am clean!
Forever I'm forgiven, for CHRIST the Lord is risen
And risen with Him we shall one day be!!

Oh, hallelujah, praise the Lamb!
Hallelujah, praise the Lamb!
My heart sings His praise again,
Hallelujah, praise the Lamb!!!

Springtime on the Hill

2009-04-09T20:12:00.005-05:00

First, I want to share with you how thoughtful my husband can be. The other day, when he was close to a "computer store", he stopped in to get a new mouse for his computer. While he was in the area, he stopped by Hobby Lobby and had a look at what they had on sale. He felt bad that he had bought himself something that he wanted to pick a couple of things for me. Is that great, or what? :)

He thought this little box was "me", lol. I thought a couple of little flower pots might fit in there.

And this cute little table for my little green buddy! I have been sitting the pot on the window sill and he was afraid it might fall off one day. He's so sweet!!

And speaking of my little green buddy, look how pretty it's gotten! Oh....and what do I see...?

A baby green buddy!! :)

And I thought I would share a few pictures from the past week, spring is definitely in swing, no matter that we had flurries in the state later that week!

These guys have been popping up all over the hillside, I just call them "umbrella plants". :)

"And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these."

Matthew 6:28, 29

A nice azalea bush ready to burst into bloom!

The greenery is returning to the hillside.

Wild strawberries :)

The sun through the plum tree leaves

Not really sure what this tree is, but I like it :)

Just a little taste of spring on our hill in Tennessee. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did!! :)

So honored

2009-04-06T20:47:00.005-05:00

My dear sister-in-Christ over at Evening Shade Morning Latte informed me this morning that she had something for me over at her blog. What did I find? A gift! All I could do at first was think "Awwwwww". I've had a crummy couple of days, but to know that this lady who I do think alot of myself would consider me worthy of something like this (something I never expected), well it did bring a smile to my face.

It is the "Love Award" and the following description accompanies it: "These blogs are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find & be friends. They are not interested in self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated."

The rules of the award are as follows: Please give more attention to these writers. Deliver this award to 8 bloggers that then need to choose 8 bloggers of their own to pass the award to. Include the following text depicting the award..."Each of the following ladies, I simply love. They each have faced their own challenges in their lives & the way they encapsulate their expierences endears them greatly to my heart."

The 8 ladies I would like to pass this one on to are:

Rebekah at Cowgirl For Jesus

Jamie at Homeschooling Baptist Brood

Natasha at Growing in grace and knowledge

Ashley at Jonash...Two of a Kind Working on a Full House

Sarah at As Lilies Sewing

Mrs. B at A Home Keepers Journey

A different Mrs. B at Her Peculiar Life

LadyofVirtue at Large Family Mothering

I know that it's possible that some may receive this twice. I certainly do not want anyone to feel obligated to pass this on. I simply felt like these ladies deserved some recognition, 'cause they've been blessin' my socks off! Again, Nichole, thank you. I truly am blessed.

*****EDIT: I don't know how I could have done this. I feel so awful. This beautiful woman deserves to be included, more than I can describe, so I am going to have to add a ninth linkie :)

Sweet Mrs. Denise at Shortybears Place

What's the point??

2009-03-31T13:02:00.002-05:00

I am almost at my wit's end. I'm certainly very nearly at my will's end. As most of you probably know, my husband and I have been attempting the South Beach diet. I am very proud that my DH has lost at least 15 lbs so far. I think I've lost 8..and then the scale said I gained a couple...and then I'll lost a couple. Granted, this is without either one of us exercising (don't you just love how men don't have to do hardly a thing to lose weight?). I did okay on the first couple of weeks, I was pretty bored at the end of those 2 weeks, but aside from one day, I did pretty well. Then came Phase 2 and it all went downhill from there, and not in a good way. I really don't know what my deal is. It's like I have to be one or the other. Either I can't eat anything but veggies and meat and not even look at anything that might have starch and carbs (aside from the ones in fruit) or I can't restrict myself at all. Either I have to go to the gym 6 days out of the week for at least 2 hours a day and take gobs of supplements and lift heavy every time I go or I do nothing. Apparently I am a woman of drastic-ness. All or nothing. And I'm tired of it! I love veggies and fruits and super healthy foods, truly I do. But I want my choclate and cookies and brownies and "stuff you know ain't great for you but it's what you were practically raised on and by golly, you love it!!" This stuff is giving me anxieties and I'm tired of having anxieties! It's just food, for crying out loud, but if I don't have a perfect diet I won't have a perfect body. At least that's what the world keeps telling me. I try not to be a glutton, but I am sometimes. That is something I am working on. But so long as I am not pigging out on the stuff, why can't I just have some foods that I enjoy? And I know that others enjoy them too. It's hard to deny there is an emotional response to foods...I mean come on, who doesn't get a great big grin at the smell of fresh baked brownies or some good ol' fried chicken? Is that a bad thing? Ugh!!

Maybe I was just meant to be a cuddly gal? If having the body everyone else says I ought to have means depriving myself and obsessing over food so much it makes me miserable, do I really even want that body? If I have to lift heavy (at one time, when I was about 125 lbs, I could squat my own body weight for 3 sets of 10 reps...I'm talking heavy lifting) and in the process lose things that make my body look feminine or gain muscularity that, even though it wasn't bulky muscularity, might make you wonder if I was a grown woman or a young man, is it worth it?? And the thing that makes me worry the most about it...my husband hasn't seen me at my heaviest, but he has seen me at my "leanest" and I'm afraid I might never "look that good" for him again. I'm in danger of either falling into something close to diet-worship, or like before: self-worship, or just not caring. I really kind of hate this. If I'm eating healthy foods more often than not, what's the big deal? I'm tired of being hungry :(

Regarding the last post's comments...

2009-03-28T13:52:00.004-05:00

I really didn't want to leave a humongous comment in my last post, but I did want to continue the subjects covered in the comments section. (Off topic, but that's probably the biggest gripe I have with communicating via blogs and over the internet in general versus in-person or phone conversations...the gap between responses and not really being able to express myself as well as in person.) Where I live in beautiful Tennessee, our frost-free date is around the middle of April, so I am waiting on getting my hands really dirty in the yard...however our lawn could definitely use a trimming if and when the rains pass long enough to let the grass dry some :) Not complaining, mind you...we're actually in a rain deficit according to the "all knowing" weather people.

My mother-in-law and I went to visit a delightful woman yesterday who starts and sells garden veggies to plant where I bought a few marigolds and a zinnia along with 6 okra plants and a few lettuce plants, all for $4.00. I think I will probably be buying a few more plants from her later in April, and she said something that makes alot of sense to me now and probably explains why my little green ones aren't doing so great. She said that while she's never used a "grow lamp" that a good reason my cukes are falling over is because it isn't natural light and being in a closet they aren't getting as strong as they would being out in the "real world" :) So, I'm already cooking up ideas for next spring and trying to save the ones I can from this year.

My corn isn't going to make it, I'm afraid. I potted (yes, potted) 4 corn plants, and those are still looking okay, but the others I had inside are looking sickly. I also potted 3 cukes, one of those is still growing with it's "real leaves" coming in, so there's some hope for those.

Rebekah, I wish I had a better answer for your comment. But, alas, the rumbly in my tumbly was just for some munchies. I'm still praying for a little one, still hoping. And you better believe it'll be posted here when it happens!

Mrs. B, I am SO glad you mentioned fertilizer! I hadn't even thought about adding it in, but I will certainly be buying some to put in my beds now.

I took a trip to Wally-world recently and saw a few lovelies I hope to buy soon...they are selling blueberry and blackberry and raspberry bushes this year! I've never seen them selling these before, but that could just be me. For $10.00 a bush, for a plant that could live for years (as long as I don't kill it) that sounded like a pretty good investment to me. And!!! (oh I was so giddy about this!!) I wish I had taken a picture yesterday...on our little trip out yesterday the MIL and I also went by a local hardware store owned by some Mennonites (I think...) and wanted to see what they might have put out in their greenhouse and as we pulled into the parking lot I saw they had what I will be calling my "very early birthday/anniversary gift". It appears that a local man has started building chicken houses! For $359.00, plus tax, I can get a house that would accommodate 8 regular sized chickens, or 12 bantams, with 3 nest boxes on one side, a skylight for ample light, and one side lets completely down for easy cleaning. It is up off the ground probably 1-2 ft. I took DH by yesterday when he got home to see what he thinks about it, and I am fairly confident that once we get our tax refund in that I can put in my order for one; it takes about a week to build.

And speaking of chickens, today is Chick Day at my favorite hardware/feed store. They started getting in chicks, ducklings and goslings in late this week and I admit to making a trip solely to see them *sheepish grin*. They are precious. I was going to get just chicks, a little further down the road, but after seeing my MIL's reaction to the little ducklings, I may have to order a couple just for her :) I'm so excited, I can't even express it. This is going to be a beautiful spring.

Preview of Spring

2009-03-14T13:18:00.004-05:00

Well, I think it's about time I posted something, don't you? I have had these pictures uploaded here for more than a week, I think, just waiting to have some sort of explanation. And since it's a Saturday night and I haven't much else to do, besides eat (I am getting a rumbly in my tumbly), do some stitching (which I will probably do once I am finished with this post) and sleep (what I have done almost all afternoon), what better way to fill that time? I am kind of disappointed that we didn't get to go and enjoy the "Spring Fest" or whatever they were calling it down in town and across the river in Linden. I can still hear the really annoying....I mean, fresh local talent thumping away on the makeshift stage down the hill in town. I don't care for the redneck talent that seems to run a muck around these parts once it starts warming up, and I like it even less when all I hear is the bass and drum beats. Now, to clarify, by using the term "redneck talent", I mean that practically all you sing about is a "country good ol' time", which by accounts around here, involves the river and a case of beer and some scantily clad women. Basically the sort of thing I go out of my way to avoid anymore. Once upon a time, I would have been one of those scantilly clad redneck women, chugging 'em down with the rest of the guys. Now I see how pathetic that sort of thing is and it really grates on my nerves when it's all I hear about around here. "Redneck talent" would also allow for the fact that, while you have wonderful talent when it comes to playing instruments of your choice, you really only have 2 or 3 songs that you have written yourself and, oh I'd say, probably FIFTY cover-songs you do really well. All the while waiting to really hit the big time. But the folks around here really think they're something. Doesn't hurt that they're playing directly across the street from the local liquor store...I bet that guy stays open late tonight...

But anyway, back to the topic at hand...the pictures. At least that is what I am making the topic now :)

This is my first year of attempting a "real" garden. Last year I tried to grow a few things, all that made it were the little tomatoes I bought from Wal-Mart. But this year I am going to try again, and try a few more things, since I have some area I can put a garden in now. It's going to be interesting to see how things pan out, since I have all these little plants started and it's still about 3 weeks from our frost-free date, and I essentially don't have any experience. But, it'll be a learning experience if nothing else! So, here is my little "greenhouse" in the closet of the guest bedroom. I assure you all of it is legal...I've already gotten a couple cracks about growing stuff in the closet. Hardy har har. Most of the things in the styrofoam cups are peppers of some sort. I've made an attempt at some cayenne, bell, banana, serrano, chili ( I think), jalapeno. Oh yeah, I want some peppers ;) I used to have alot more in the cups, but, like a big dummy I left them no way for the soil to drain until recently, when I put some holes in the cups. LOL. Do they make a "Gardening for Dummies"? I could probably use it. My foxglove and larkspur consequently didn't make it. Actually, none of my flowers have made it, save the few that I planted in the peat cups and trays...I should probably make a note of that. So far, almost all my peppers are still showing signs of life.

I've also started some corn and beans. Those aren't seeds I've ever seen sold as being started, like peppers or tomatoes, but that's not to say it doesn't happen. I just haven't seen them. It'll be interesting to see how those work out...they're still beautiful and live and I'm tickled...hopefully they won't die and I can have corn and beans a little earlier! I've also started some cucumbers and tomatoes. Tomatoes are looking okay ( so much has changed since having taken these pictures, well, not a whole lot, but they have changed) but I've never started them before, so we'll see. Cucumbers have already experienced a couple of casualties; I had a few that had grown so tall they were leaning over, and still hadn't gotten their "true" leaves. A coworker of my husband's suggested planting them in deeper soil, maybe it was that they were growing too big for the little planter I had them in. So I did for 3 of my little peat planters and now two of them have shriveled up. I've got some spices that are peeking up out of the dirt now; basil, oregano, marjoram, a few others I can't think of at the moment. I've also tried a couple of peas, a squash.

My sweeties :)

And some beautiful blooms!

These were so lovely, but kind of smelled...bad.

I just love spring, and I am so thankful that it seems she is here to stay, at last! I can't help but think about the beauty that God has made in the new green life around us, and how He seems to bring out the best of so many things in this season. I am reminded that, like spring, He has made us new creations through His Son, Jesus, that we might be full of life and beauty, and not like the dead things without renewal. We were meant to be thus, and I am forever grateful.

I know, I know

2009-03-06T16:42:00.002-06:00

Less than an hour after saying I wasn't going to post alot, here I am again. But I'm telling ya, this really really burns me up!! Check this out, it's news to me:

"Sarah Palin’s true colors have been showing a lot lately. Her support for the dangerous Law of the Sea Treaty, her outrageous, Planned Parenthood-inspired statement that people need to get over the “ideal of abstinence. Life happens” in her interview with a Fox reporter a few weeks ago, and now, her ignoring the pleas of Christian pro-lifers not to place a former Planned Parenthood Board member on the Alaska Supreme Court. It’s time “conservatives” wrapped their minds around the fact that this woman is not the future hope of the Republican party. Not even close."

From the Slice of Laodicea site.

EXCUSE ME!? And our churches were backing this woman!! Our preacher and fellow congregants proudly displaying this "pro-life feminist's" name on their bumpers and in their yards, going on and on about what a wonderful Christian this woman was. And she says this??! I never was a supporter of her, however awesome her hair was (and it was awesome), for the sheer fact that a woman in an office of that high ranking would be unlikely to really be free to be truly submissive to her husband at all times. And the fact that I don't believe women ought to have to work outside the home and the whole "First Dude" thing. I mean, come on! Ugh. Okay. Rant over. For now.

Just some general goings-on around here

2009-03-06T15:40:00.005-06:00

Happy Friday everyone!! I hope the sun is shining as brightly and the birds are singing as sweetly for you as they are for me today! I figured I'd mosey on over and leave a few words and pictures since I haven't been very active posting. As a matter of fact, because my life is so uneventful right now I probably won't post often, unless something exciting happens or something really ticks me off ;) I'll just save up all the little goodies until Friday or so and share them then, okay? Okay!

Well, this week has been quite a weather roller coaster! We've gone from snow still on the ground in some places the sun can shine on and the hills still covered where the sun doesn't shine (that sounds horrible!) quite as much to a warm wonderful 70+ degrees today! God is so amazing! But, thankfully before all that snow arrived last Saturday, I did have a chance to go out and cut some daffodils (or buttercups as I call them, which is actually a misnomer since they really smell like honey) to brighten up our little kitchen table. They're such happy, simple little flowers! I am thankful the good Lord made me a simple woman who is easy to amuse and entertain :)

And then, we have my sweet little green friend. I can barely believe how much it's grown! It's becoming a lovely plant, from a drab little stick of a cutting that I was almost sure would never grow with my nearly black thumb. Is that not how we must seem to Him before we know His mercy, like lifeless, joyless little unproductive things? Anyone else might not see any potential for us and just toss us away. But, God is good even to little green things, isn't He? How much better He is to us!

Finally today I am proud and relieved to say that I am almost finished with my "chicken condo". It's really more of a Charlie Brown Christmas Tree kind of house, but I am fairly confident it will be safe and provide ample refuge from inclement weather. I hope it will come a good rain, so I might make sure it'll withstand some forces before I move any tenants in! Come to think of it, I'm not so sure I've shared my chicken story with my fellow bloggies, have I? Well, if you remember the jewel eggs that I shared with y'all from last month, you might remember how thankful and excited I had been to have received them. Well.....the generous woman who furnished those eggs has offered me a rooster of hers and a couple of hens!! It has been a dream of mine, since we first decided to buy this house, that I might have a few clucky hens around here but I have waited, mostly because DH has asked me to hold off a little while. So I haven't brought the issue up too often since then. Then, lo and behold! Mrs. Delores offers a few birds to me! That just made my heart swell that God would make a way for me to start small (I had intended to order many more chicks and raise them up) and test the waters. I have tried to be patient and He provided my heart's desire! What an Awesome Savior! So, counted the coins I had collected in a coffee can and went down to the local hardware store and bought about $30 worth of materials, brought it home and scrounged around for what we had here (see, being a packrat is not always a bad thing!) and found that I had plenty of paneling and plywood to actually take a stab at it! Slowly, but surely, it has become a decent, temporary coop. I've still got some work to do on it, like the top of the tiny run and a nestbox and roost, just small things, really, but I am so excited. What I have done to deserve such blessings is beyond me, but I will never cease to praise HIM for them all.

Well, I think that about does it for this time. I hope each and every one of you has a blessed weekend, and make sure you remember to praise God for every good and precious thing, no matter how small it may seem. If it makes you smile, it's worth praising Him for :)

The Simple Woman's Daybook, 03-02-09

2009-03-02T08:56:00.006-06:00

For more, you can visit Peggy

FOR TODAY...

Outside my window...the few remnants of our snowfall Saturday night are melting away in the beautiful sunlight

I am thinking...many thoughts, mental spasms, if you will

I am thankful for...this warm house and the love here

From the learning rooms...I'll be getting back into studying tomorrow

From the kitchen...healthy, yummy meals

I am wearing...the snuggly lap blankets I received at Christmas

I am creating...plans and hopes

I am going...to let my sister-in-Christ show me her favorite herb store, I'm learning some about home remedies and looking forward to trying some concoctions

I am reading...The South Beach Diet, Taking Charge of Your Fertility, God's Word

I am hoping...the the ten-degree increase in temperatures every day this week won't leave me miserable with sinuses and colds

I am hearing...the quietness of morning

Around the house...there is some tidying to do, I'm still trying to catch up from last week!

One of my favorite things...the pictures of spring, the seeds sprouting and growing, a glimpse into what summer may hold

A few plans for the rest of the week: visit the herb store, learn a song for Easter, Wednesday church service, studying

Here is picture thought I am sharing...

A picture of one of the bald eagles my husband took a while back. This always reminds me of the Scripture, "But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run and not be weary; and they shall walk and not faint."
Isaiah 40:31

I's not fat, I's just fluffy!

2009-03-01T20:39:00.003-06:00

However, I have become so fluffy that I can no longer dry what few pants that fit me in the dryer because it "shrinks" them. It appears denim is not so forgiving of my fluffiness ;) I have been "trying" to lose weight for a little while now, but honestly haven't been giving it as much effort as it needs to actually work (in other words, I eat too much and not the right things) I have come to the realization that no matter how much I talk about it or wish for it or loathe myself in the mirror, it isn't going to change a thing if I don't change a thing. So, you can imagine my relief when my husband came home from the doctor the other day with orders to try and lose weight, for real, unless he wants to be on medication for the rest of his life; he's 28 now and taking 3 different cholesterol meds. Then he tells me that he might try the South Beach diet, so I went to the library and borrowed the book about it, complete with recipes. And I have to say, I'm pretty excited! The recipes look delicious and it's food that we (for the most part) really enjoy. Phase One includes food such as cheese and proteins and veggies, no sugars or breads or starches like 'taters and corn. And this is the strictest phase! Now DH isn't much for vegetables, so it's going to be quite a transition for him, but I have faith he can do it. Today was our first day and he's already eaten more lettuce than I've seen him eat the whole time we've been together! I'm so proud of him :) He's so tired of taking pills.

Like I said, today is our first day, and I won't be able to prepare all the recipes right away because we just can't afford it, but I've got a couple different ones for each meal of the day and I'll go back and forth and maybe next time I go to the store we can try something new. Breakfast was a 2-egg omelet with canadian bacon and just a sprinkling of fat-free cheddar cheese and a small glass of tomato juice. Lunch was grilled chicken breast on a bed of romaine lettuce with homemade balsamic vinaigrette with sugar-free jello pudding, and dinner was baked rosemary salmon with tossed salad and vanilla ricotta creme for dessert. It was delicious! I'll have to share the recipes sometime :)

So, first phase is two weeks, minimum, and supposedly this is when you lose the most weight. I think I'm mostly looking forward to feeling, well, not so fat. So, I'm clearing off my weight loss ticker that hasn't budged in a good 2 weeks, and start over. I'm starting with 150.5 lbs. Granted, it was after dinner, but...150 lbs! Looking forward to changing that. Soon.

And just to clarify

2009-02-25T12:41:00.002-06:00

I was going to just leave this reply in the comment section of my last post, but I wanted to make sure I put this out there, so that I could be clear. I have four-leaf clovers all over my page. Most people probably associate that with luck, I know I used to. But I want to make clear that is not the reason I have them up there. First, I like green and I like clovers. I think they're pretty. Second, clovers are often associated with St. Patrick's Day, which is coming up, and if I'm not mistaken, is of an Irish origin (feel free to correct me!!). I am partly of Irish origin. I have no papers to confirm it, but from what I understand, my Iris ancestors are of royal blood according to some genealogy work a relative has done. But, again, I have no proof. I love things that are Irish and would love to visit the Emerald Isle someday. So, in conclusion, and in words that would have made this post much shorter, I just like clovers :)

So, tell me

2009-02-25T10:49:00.002-06:00

What is the difference in a graven image or idol, and a lucky charm, seeing as there is no such thing as luck?

Idols in the pocket?

All three of the candidates are included.

You just put one foot in front of the other...

2009-02-25T10:14:00.003-06:00

...That's all I really can do. I've stated my case, made my plea. Now I just have to have faith and keep going. Last week I mailed off the last $75.00 Penn Foster will receive from me. I suspect I will be resuming the course at the end of this week or beginning of next, whenever the check clears. I don't understand at what point the Scriptures or my own convictions meet the resistance of my husband's mind or heart. But I love him. I would die for him. If I ever lost him, I'm not sure what would become of me. And, if not for those reasons, he is my husband and I have an obligation to obey and submit, and to do so cheerfully. I'm still working on the cheerful part ;) But I agreed to at least try to finish this thing, so I will hold up my part and I know God will do His part. He is more faithful than I could ever hope to be. So I can at least try. I appreciate the prayers, and the thoughts. Sisters, I cannot express the way my heart swells when I go over comments left. Almost every time, that swelling makes it to my eyes, and it's like trying to see through fogged windows :) I do not know what I have ever done to deserve such a family in Christ, but y'all are good for my spirit. So, I'll just keep on keepin' on, clinging to Faith. Maybe Father has more in store than I can understand right now. So we're gonna wait and see :)

The Simple Woman's Daybook 2-23-09

2009-02-23T10:28:00.004-06:00

FOR TODAY

Outside my window...the sun is shining brightly, making it appear warmer than it really is

I am thinking...I may not have to go to the doctor after all

I am thankful for...a husband who is so caring

From the kitchen...I will be baking bread today and 3 Bean Chili

I am wearing...the same pajamas I wore yesterday

I am creating...nothing new

I am going...to be doing some serious cleaning. Being sick gets me behind :(

I am reading...a book I've borrowed from a sister at church, learning about my fertility and signs that go along with different phases

I am hoping...that I am getting better and my body isn't playing tricks on me

I am hearing...the washing machine, my Monday morning ritual

Around the house...ugh. This place is filthy.

One of my favorite things...the daffodils in the yard. I've always called them buttercups, but they really ought to be called "honey cups" because that's what they smell like.

A few plans for the rest of the week: not sure yet, just have to see how I am feeling

Here is picture thought I am sharing...

I love cute little animals with pretend lisps :)

Just to pass the time

2009-02-19T21:17:00.002-06:00

I don't have the desire to make a huge, or even a deeply thoughtful post right now. But one is coming...I can feel it a-brewin'. But I did find something that I thought was "cute" and doesn't take alot of time to do. And I just like Winnie The Pooh. Especially the "classic" Pooh :) Hope it brings a smile to your face, it sure did to mine.

Take the 100 Acre Personality Quiz!

Torn

2009-02-10T20:27:00.003-06:00

My time has run out. In order for me to continue my online course I will have to give them yet another $75.00 for another chance to finish this thing in six months. Again. I have been so lazy with it, I literally wasted 2 years. Now I don't know if I can finish it. I just don't know if I can run through the other courses. I don't want to waste anymore money. I'm afraid of sending them yet more money and then not finish, or even worse, fail the whole thing. And I simply don't want it. I'm so tired of feeling like I have to have some sort of "schooling" and I am afraid of my husband being resentful of me. Why can't it be good enough for me to be a real housewife and not a part-time housewife and a part time student all the time?? There is absolutely positively NO DOUBT in my mind, in my heart, that we are going to be FINE. Someone will buy my car, we will pay off these bills, maybe not right away (okay, definitely not right away) but it will be done. Jehovah Jireh will provide!! Am I just trying to "shirk" responsibilities? I am not seeking to just be a lazy woman. I have the desire to work, just not is the ways that others seem to think I should be. *sigh* I kind of feel odd that I have no fear, no doubt. It's like my complete faith and desire has crowded everything else out. There is no room for doubt. There is no vacancy for fear. But I do desire support. I can't do anything until after the 15th either way. I pray Father will speak to me. I need His answer. I am desperate for it. I am so torn. Please God, help me.

The Simple Woman's Daybook 2-9-09

2009-02-09T11:55:00.005-06:00

I got this from Ms. Peggy

FOR TODAY February 9, 2009

Outside my window...the sun is shining brightly, the wind chimes are singing and dry leaves are flying.

I am thinking...that I'm gonna be heartbroken when February returns

I am thankful for...the peace I have in Jesus, in spite of the world

From the kitchen...some bread, we are eating on the last loaf from the freezer

I am wearing...a pretty pink button up shirt with a pink tank top under and a khaki skirt with pretty pink and purple flowers on it. I am so ready for spring :)

I am creating...lots of plans for the spring!

I am going...to check out a church sister's chicken coop and see the few chickens she has so generously offered! God is SO GOOD!!

I am reading...in 1 Samuel, God's chosen people were rejecting Him and begging for a human king so He handed them over to themselves and appointed one for them....sounds alot like today.

I am hoping... this weather is a sign of things to come soon and maybe the wind won't blow my sheets off the line!

I am hearing... the wind chimes and the washing machine. We bought the wind chimes on our honeymoon and they bring back wonderful memories of our first few days as husband and wife

Around the house...there is some cleaning to be done and floors to be swept, as soon as I finish this!

One of my favorite things...the smell of warm air and waking up to birds singing

A few plans for the rest of the week: plan out a coop for my gift chickens, grocery shopping

Here is picture thought I am sharing...

My mother's parents (Granpappy and Grannie Annie) and me, circa 1982
I remember staying up late watching "boogie" movies with him and women's wrestling in the summer. He's been with the Lord since the early 1990's and I miss him alot. I love them both, Grannie is such a prayer warrior and a sweet sweet woman.

Thankful Thursday

2009-02-05T22:20:00.007-06:00

I know it's kinda late, but I wanted to share the little extras I have that I am so thankful for. Nothing real big or fancy, but something that brings me great joy (when I'm not fixing my mistakes, that is). This week I am thankful for the simple joys I get from my new favorite hobby: cross stitching!

And this guy, ain't he sweet :)

This past week my sweet mother-in-law came by and brought me all her cross stitching paraphernalia. She used to do it all the time, but she says her eyes can't stand it anymore and found out I enjoy it, so I guess you can say I inherited a few things :)

Among the things she brought over were these lovely pieces, I just love them! The scenic pieces are just precious, and I'm trying to find the perfect place for them on our bedroom walls. The little cowboy is one she stitched for DH when he was a boy and it was in his room for a while. I like to think we can put it in a son's room someday, if the Lord sees fit :)

And books! She gave me over $30.00 worth of patterns, and this was back in the '80's, so I don't know how much they'd be worth today and I can't express how tickled I am! Funny how my tastes are obviously antique-minded, lol! Classics never go out of style ;)

And extras! I feel like I have a goldmine now! And so much thread, I may not have to buy any for a while!! And fabric! And bibs :)

These are actually some that MIL's late cousin stitched, she loved bibs and its nice to think I might get to pass these on. She was a sweet lady who was loved greatly and is missed even more

And a frame-thingy (still learning the lingo, sorry), I also have a round one now that I am using on the piece I'm doing right now.

And an authentic White House bag. MIL's (actually should say FIL) cousin who passed on, her husband is still alive and was actually a member of the secret service for President Reagan, I believe. I could be wrong, but he did work for a president at one time.

And this is what I'm working on. I've had it for 3 years, as long as we've been married, and now I finally have time to do it! Yay!

I am so thankful for the little things that brighten my day. God gave me a heart that feels full with simple things and it doesn't take alot to amuse me. As silly as it may sound, I am thankful for that :)

Playing Catch-Up

2009-02-04T21:08:00.011-06:00

Hello! It's been a while since I've posted anything on my own blog, although I've posted on almost everyone elses, lol. So, I have lots of pictures to share, though it certainly doesn't include everything. But, so to spare everyone a marathon post, I'll have to make two :) And now, on with it!!

We got snow last week! And not just a few flurries like we had been having, but real accumulation! It was so lovely to see, it certainly is a treat to see the white stuff around these parts. I'm thankful I didn't have to drive in it.

These first few pictures are of the snowfall the day it occurred. I couldn't get any good pictures, but we have a family of squirrels in area that seemed to be enjoying the snow as much as I was because they were all over the place! Their dark coats really stood out against the bright white precipitation and it was an added joy to watch them scurrying and jumping from tree to tree

DH got a sweet little picture of some little footprints, I thought they were darling :)

And the fast falling snow couldn't deter some hungry little creatures from a free meal!

And what could be better than homemade pancakes on a snowy morning? Recipe to come!

And it seemed to disappear just as quickly as it came, here are a few shots from the next morning

And every now and then we have a brave critter come to call. I was quite surprised to see this guy, though! He was amusing to watch, I just wanted to scoop him up!

Nevermind the garbage bags, they're full of leaves and I have about 20 of them on the porch!

And at choir practice week before last we played a little game for prizes (we usually do this when our director has old music to get rid of, LOL) and I was the lucky gal who won these pretty-hued eggs. I have greatly enjoyed them :)

Well, I guess that's about it for this evening. I already have more to share, but it's getting late and I would like to have at least something to share next time. Hope you all have a blessed rest of the week, and may you feel His love and grace in all things.

Love and hugs,

Just wanted to check in...

2009-01-27T20:38:00.003-06:00

...and let y'all know I'm okay. I haven't fallen off the hill! (okay, it would probably help if I let y'all know we live on top of a hill and that was my attempt at a joke, har har) I know I haven't posted anything in a while, but what do you post when you don't really have anything new? I missed church Sunday morning and evening because of a bad stomach and I think it's kind of thrown me out of routine. I just don't like missing church. So I am seriously looking forward to tomorrow evening and choir practice. I love being in the choir. How can you not? It's an opportunity for me to get up there and sing to my King! I get to stand there and sing AT THE TOP OF MY LUNGS praises to my Father! The ONE WHO SAVED ME! The One Who's comin' back for me someday! My God! My Lord! Sometimes I take that for granted. God gave me a gift, a love, a passion for praising Him. I absolutely L.O.V.E. doing it for Him. And what really burns my biscuits is to be up there, trying to give Him my best and to look down into the congregation and see complacency. You might as well be reading War and Peace (no offense to those who love that book. I've never read it personally, but it's a big book!) without showing any pictures. They look bored! Now, I realize and completely understand that people worship differently. Some people raise their hands in praise to Him. Some people close their eyes, some might sway back and forth, from one foot to the other, and some are very still and very quiet with their worship, they are very reverent. But to see people just stand there, sometimes having conversations, just like they've got something else better to do. WHERE IS THE RESPECT??! This is your Creator we're singing to! What gives? What's it going to take? Does everyone have to get to the very bottom of life before they see they've got something to be thankful for? Am I overreacting? I get very frustrated at what appears to be a lack of concern.

And I recently saw something on another blog; it was a quote by a Rev. Spurgeon, I believe, and it's got me thinking about some things. It goes like this: “The devil has seldom done a cleverer thing than hinting to the church that part of their mission is to provide entertainment for the people, with a view to winning them...providing amusement for the people is nowhere spoken of in the Scriptures as a function of the church...the need is for Biblical doctrine, so understood and felt that it sets men aflame.” I can't help but think about myself. How many times have I gotten up there in front of the congregation to sing a song of my choosing, having chosen that song because it "suited" me. I do occasionally share a "special" song, and I try to make it a point to pick something that ties in with my own testimony, my own journey. I try to choose something that will convey something God has spoken to me about. But now I am wondering if that is what is received. I wonder if I'm trying to take that opportunity to do my own little "sermon" with some popular contemporary song that sounds good. That's part of the reason I've become more and more turned off by mainstream Christian music. So much glitter in it. Really nice clothes. Really perfect hair. Aesthetically pleasing, for sure. Easy to listen to. I know there are songs that have really spoken to me, so it's hard to make blanket statements. But when I see artists come out with yet another cd of hymns done "their way", it bothers me. I can't help but wonder, what are they really in it for? Who are they trying to glorify? Why do we need another cd of that? I sound like a party-pooper, but really, c'mon. Just something else for me to over-think, I guess.

I think I've done enough damage for today :)

A Father's Love Letter

2009-01-22T10:42:00.001-06:00

Father's Love Letter

My Child ~
You may not know me, but I know everything about you ~ Psalm 139:1
I know when you sit down and when you rise up ~ Psalm 139:2
I am familiar with all your ways ~ Psalm 139:3
Even the very hairs on your head are numbered ~ Matthew 10:29-31
For you were made in my image ~ Genesis 1:27
In me you live and move and have your being ~ Acts 17:28
For you are my offspring ~ Acts 17:28
I knew you even before you were conceived ~ Jeremiah 1:4-5
I chose you when I planned creation ~ Ephesians 1:11-12
You were not a mistake, for all your days are written in my book ~ Psalm 139:15-16
I determined the exact time of your birth and where you would live ~ Acts 17:26
You are fearfully and wonderfully made ~ Psalm 139:14
I knit you together in your mother's womb ~ Psalm 139:13
And brought you forth on the day you were born ~ Psalm 71:6
I have been misrepresented by those who don't know me ~ John 8:41-44
I am not distant and angry, but am the complete expression of love ~ 1 John 4:16
And it is my desire to lavish my love on you ~ 1 John 3:1
Simply because you are my child and I am your father ~ 1 John 3:1
I offer you more than your earthly father ever could ~ Matthew 7:11
For I am the perfect father ~ Matthew 5:48
Every good gift that you receive comes from my hand ~ James 1:17
For I am your provider and I meet all your needs ~ Matthew 6:31-33
My plan for your future has always been filled with hope ~ Jeremiah 29:11
Because I love you with an everlasting love ~ Jeremiah 31:3
My thoughts toward you are countless as the sand on the seashore ~ Psalm 139:17-18
And I rejoice over you with singing ~ Zephaniah 3:17
I will never stop doing good to you ~ Jeremiah 32:40
For you are my treasured possession ~ Exodus 19:5
I desire to establish you with all my heart and all my soul ~ Jeremiah 32:41
And I want to show you great and marvelous things ~ Jeremiah 33:3
If you seek me with all your heart, you will find me ~ Deuteronomy 4:29
Delight in me and I will give you the desires of your heart ~ Psalm 37:4
For it is I who gave you those desires ~ Philippians 2:13
I am able to do more for you than you could possibly imagine ~ Ephesians 3:20
For I am your greatest encourager ~ 2 Thessalonians 2:16-17
I am also the Father who comforts you in all your troubles ~ 2 Corinthians 1:3-4
When you are brokenhearted, I am close to you ~ Psalm 34:18
As a shepherd carries a lamb, I have carried you close to my heart ~ Isaiah 40:11
One day I will wipe away every tear from your eyes ~ Revelation 21:3-4
And I'll take away all the pain you have suffered on this earth ~ Revelation 21:3-4
I am your Father, and I love you even as I love my son, Jesus ~ John 17:23
For in Jesus, my love for you is revealed ~ John 17:26
He is the exact representation of my being ~ Hebrews 1:3
He came to demonstrate that I am for you, not against you ~ Romans 8:31
And to tell you that I am not counting your sins ~ 2 Corinthians 5:18-19
Jesus died so that you and I could be reconciled ~ 2 Corinthians 5:18-19
His death was the ultimate expression of my love for you ~ 1 John 4:10
I gave up everything I loved that I might gain your love ~ Romans 8:31-32
If you receive the gift of my son Jesus, you receive me ~ 1 John 2:23
And nothing will ever separate you from my love again ~ Romans 8:38-39
Come home and I'll throw the biggest party heaven has ever seen ~ Luke 15:7
I have always been Father, and will always be Father ~ Ephesians 3:14-15
My question is ~ Will you be my child? ~ John 1:12-13
I am waiting for you ~ Luke 15:11-32
Love, Your Dad, Almighty God

Thank you, thank you, thank you!

2009-01-21T10:25:00.003-06:00

*sigh* How can I say thank you enough? I really am not a fan of myself exposing all this for anyone to see. Then I can't really control what others think of me, right? :) I've had this blog for about a month and already I've had two pity parties. Christians aren't supposed to have break-downs on a regular basis, we're supposed to be stronger than that, right? At least not the really good ones.

"I need Thee, oh I need Thee, every hour I need Thee..."

And I just want to make sure I say this at least once, I'm not "trying" to be a drama queen. That is not my intention of having this blog, but I do think these things out to be a good place to let things out. Part of being honest with myself is being honest with others. Or at least putting it down somewhere that I can reflect on it later (and I'm a much faster typist than writer).

I cannot tell you how much I appreciate the concerned comments, the encouraging words that have been share with me. I was going to use this as a reply to the comments I had received, but I knew this was going to be a long one. I am getting better now :) I tend to get like that around "that time", I guess because I spend alot of time hoping in the month before "she" gets here, that maybe this month will be the month. I spend alot of time praying, maybe I am praying for the wrong things. I am moved by the love and concern expressed in your comments. You people don't even know me! And still you take the time to show you care. May God bless you all for your compassion. I'd give y'all a big ol' hug if I could!!

Father, help me. Teach me how to be content and thankful for the place I am in right now. Show me how to just be. I'm afraid I'm not as good at it as I thought I was. Forgive me for the doubt I have sometimes, help me to really believe You have got this all under control and it will go as YOU plan, not me. Help me to believe that truly, not just "know" it. Help me to live it. Everyday. Every hour and ever minute. I give thanks to You for saving me. I give thanks to You for my sisters (and maybe brothers) out there who are praying for me. I give thanks to You for Your Son, who died so I might live, who didn't have to but loved us all so much He willing did so. I thank you for the songbirds outside my window that help me to remember that Spring is coming, You are coming. There is Light at the end of the tunnel, and it's You. For everything in life, there is You. Thank You, Thank You, Thank YOU.

And for anyone who would like to email me, for whatever reason (I can be a good shoulder too :), I would like to offer it to you: amy_celeste_@hotmail.com

Freedom of Choice Act aka Freedom to Kill Act

2009-01-20T10:07:00.002-06:00

I would like to share with you a post from a blog that I enjoy visiting. She has wonderful things that she shares, so if you get time, I highly recommend exploring her blog. Today is a really big day for many Americans. For me, I will not lie, I am a little anxious. I know in my mind and in my heart God is in control of everything, regardless of who is "running" this country. But I also believe America is going to have to pay for her disobedience to His Word one day. Who knows when. I will not be surprised if it is sooner than we think. Our youngest are already paying for us. Please pray.

Visionary Womanhood

"... Remember that with God all things are possible and the power of prayer is undeniable. If you are against the killing of defenseless children then the time is now to do something about it!

"The first thing I'd do as president is sign the Freedom of Choice Act. That's the first thing that I'd do." -- Senator Barack Obama, speaking to the Planned Parenthood Action Fund, July 17, 2007..."

I need me some springtime

2009-01-19T22:24:00.004-06:00

I'm starting to wonder if I'm okay. I'm feeling so incredibly bummed right now. I just feel like crying. So begins yet another month of being a "mommy-wannabe". It's been one year and four month since I quit birth control and handed my fertility back to God. I know He has His own timetable. He opens and closes the womb. I know this. Why am I so impatient? I just want a little one so badly, it hurts. Why do I feel such an urgency? Why do I seem to be the only one who truly wants this? DH isn't really concerned. He believes things will happen when they happen. I wish I was so laid back. DH's parents are wonderful people, but they act almost scared when I say anything referring to babies. His father swears he had my husband "fixed" at birth. His mother acts like it's the end of the world for a cousin who is married and pregnant at 19 years old. It breaks my heart.

Is there something wrong with me? I feel so imbalanced. Maybe I just need some sleep.
I'm going to go try that.

Yummy goodness :)

2009-01-13T20:55:00.006-06:00

It is so cold here. I mean, it makes my toes hurt. In a couple of days it's gonna be "stupid cold"! Okay, so I do live in Tennessee and 'round these parts we tend to be "winter weenies". We're such big sissies that folks were complaining when it dropped below 45 degrees in December. Big babies. I mean totally mean that in a loving way! :D (can you tell I'm feeling better?)

But a big plus to the cold weather certainly has to be cold-weather food! I love soups and warm, spicy dinners but. let's face it, who wants chili in the middle of summer? Not I! But, oh do I love it in the middle of January :) Tonight I fixed us up some 3 Bean Chili, one that is definitely a favorite of ours. We had some num-nummy cornbread to accompany the chili. I don't have any pictures of dinner to share, but I do have recipes!! Yay!

3 BEAN CHILI

(makes 8 cups)

1 Tbsp olive oil
1 medium-sized onion, chopped
2 cloves garlic, peeled and chopped (I used 1 tsp of dried minced garlic)
3 Tbsp chili powder
2 sweet bell peppers, cored and diced
1 medium-sized zucchini, trimmed and diced (I left this out, dh doesn't like alot fo veggies)
1 can (14 1/2 ounces) diced tomatoes
1 can (8 oz) no salt-added tomato sauce
1/4 Cup ketchup
1/2 tsp dried oregano
1 can (15 oz) black beans, drained and rinsed
1 can (15 oz) small white beans, drained and rinsed
1 can (15 oz) red kidney beans
Grated cheddar cheese (optional)

1. Heat oil in a large nonstick pot over medium heat. Add onion, garlic, and chili powder and cook for 3 minutes.

2. Add peppers and zucchini and continue to cook 5 minutes, stirring occasionally.

3. Stir in tomatoes, tomato sauce, ketchup and oregano. Cook 8 minutes.

4. Gently stir in the beans. Cover the pot and continue to cook 3 minutes. Serve with grated cheese, if desired.

Nutritional info per cup: 203 calories; 4 g fat; 11 g protein; 39 g carbohydrate; 12 g fiber; 678 mg sodium; 0 mg cholesterol

Good Old Fashioned Cornbread

2 Cups cornmeal
1 1/2 Cups flour
2 tsp salt
2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp baking soda
2 tsp sugar (optional)
3 eggs, beaten
1 Tbsp oil or Crisco for skillet
2 Cups milk
1/4 Cup melted butter

1. Preheat oven to 425 degrees. Put oil in skillet & skillet into the oven.

2. Combine cornmeal, flour, salt, soda, baking powder, and sugar,

3. In another bowl, whisk together eggs, milk & butter. Combine with dry ingredients and stir until all is moistened.

4. Take skillet out of the oven and make sure your skillet is coated well with oil and pour your mixture into the skillet. Bake for 20-25 minutes.

Enjoy!

An Update!

2009-01-13T19:58:00.007-06:00

Hey y'all! I figured it was time for an update on my little green friend.

There have been a few days that I could set the little guy in the window so it could get some warm rays, which I'm sure it really appreciated. I know I would! :)

This was from one day last week, I don't remember which day.

And here's a shot from today. I'm not sure if you can tell much difference, but it appears that a few of the smaller leaves are growing just a bit. They seem more noticeable to me than before.

And here's a peek at one of my littlest friends! God has a purpose for us all, even if we live in the dirt :)

The Simple Woman's Daybook

2009-01-12T09:27:00.003-06:00

hosted by Peggy

FOR TODAY, January 11, 2009

Outside my window...
the frost is still blanketing the ground, though it is already 9:30

I am thinking...
I sure do miss Spring time

I am thankful for...
God's forgiveness and mercy

From the learning rooms...
I'm still studying for my class, currently learning about computers

From the kitchen...
I think I may fix up Almond Date Biscotti later

I am wearing...
pajamas, still

I am creating...
ideas in my mind for springtime projects, plants

I am going...
likely nowhere today, just holed up where it's warm :)

I am reading...
about Joshua in the Bible, trying to go through the His word, front to back.

I am hoping...
for a fruitful day

I am hearing...
not much, however the washing machine did just beep at me (I'm done! I'm done!)

Around the house...
Oh me...I kinda slacked this past week, lots of things to keep me busy this week!!

One of my favorite things...
is visiting this blog, he's giving me ideas and the beautiful pictures help me to look forward to warm days ahead :)

A few plans for the rest of the week:
cleaning, studying, working to eat healthy, praising and learning about my Lord

Here is picture thought I am sharing...

Resurrection Day, 2008

Ahhhh, spring...how I pine for thee!

Thankful Thursday

2009-01-08T09:45:00.004-06:00

I am so thankful. I really can't say it any better than that. No matter how gloomy I may feel on the inside, I am still thankful.

I am thankful that the Lord has promised this storm too shall pass. I am thankful that He reminds me that this is not all there is, not all this life is about. Though it is an important issue, if I will put Him first all this other stuff will fall in line. But I know I need to be conscious of Him and choose to, strive, fight to keep Him in my day, all day. That can be a hard task, but He has promised me His Strength. And at the end, His Rest.

I am thankful for the breath in my lungs and the sun on my skin and His Word on paper. I am thankful I can read the love letter He has written to my soul, without fear of imprisonment. I am thankful for the ability to read, so many are illiterate. I cannot imagine life without being able to read. Words can be such a balm to my soul, especially from sister and brothers in His blood, life would be such a dark place for me if I could not share in this.

I am thankful for so much, I truly cannot express it. I wish I could. But it appears these blogs don't come with a "shout" feature :)

Random thoughts...I get alot of those...

2009-01-07T21:19:00.003-06:00

I am seriously bummed. I tend to get like this every now and then...I guess that's what they call a "valley"? I'm not feeling very fond of myself. I'm overweight and I feel pretty much repulsive. I feel like that person that others talk about...you know the one...her clothes are just a little too tight. I can barely stand to see myself in the mirror. Just a whole lotta "yuck". I don't think it would feel so bad if I hadn't been doing so good before. I lost this weight about 2 years ago and then POOF! Here I am again. Feeling nasty. But I'll be okay in a couple of days. Or until I seriously see some weight-loss.

I've been mulling over a garden this summer. I would love to have one, and enough come from that I could do some canning. I feel like it would help save us money, and I get great satisfaction from that sort of labor. Seeing something I did (with God's blessings, of course) that is helping our family. I'm thinking of raised beds, maybe just a couple, of the veggies I know DH will eat (corn, beans) and then some that I love and that we use even if it isn't raw. I've been reading that several plants, like peppers and tomatoes and cucumbers, do very well in pots. Something I'm definitely considering.

I remember having chickens and rabbits growing up. I've wanted one or both ever since we started talking about buying the house. And with the stuff they pump into the poor animals anymore, I'm getting to where I feel bad buying meat, but we have no other option right now. And fresh eggs....man, I really miss that.

I have been praying for a while that God would bless us with a child. I know His timing is perfect and all things are best when we accept His way of things. But I long for a child so much it hurts sometimes. I am getting better though. I'm not so obsessed over it anymore. Sometimes I feel like Hannah, but He opens and closes in His time. Not mine. But I still pray. God, please help me.

I am trying.

The Simple Woman's Daybook

2009-01-05T08:14:00.003-06:00

Hosted by Peggy

FOR TODAY, 1/5/2009...

Outside my window...
things are pretty wet and quite chilly

I am thinking...
there has to be some way to not be so hard to wake up in the mornings...
wish I could figure that out

I am thankful for...
my church family. We're not perfect, but I truly feel a desire to love God there

From the learning rooms...
back to studying

From the kitchen...
maybe some bread later, but only breakfast thus far

I am wearing...
my pajamas

I am creating...
started on a cross stitch project I've had since DH and I married 3 years ago.

I am going...
to exercise after this

I am reading...
nothing in particular, other than the Bible

I am hoping...
to get a chance to finish getting the leaves up out of the yard sometime this week

I am hearing...
not much, it's pretty calm

Around the house...
I need to do some tidying up

One of my favorite things...
my bed. It's so soft and comfy and warm...

A few plans for the rest of the week:
studying, going to the bank tomorrow, getting back on schedule

Here is picture thought I am sharing...

Our God is an awesome God

Nag, nag, nag!

2009-01-03T20:04:00.004-06:00

That's all my head has felt today: a nagging headache. I think it's probably a sinus headache, because it's primarily been behind my eyes and I can feel it in my nasal area. But it did migrate to the back of my head earlier. I haven't accomplished much at all today, and I'm kinda disappointed. I was hoping to finish getting up the leaf piles that have been in our yard since before Thanksgiving; I started yesterday and was looking forward to finishing it up today, but that didn't happen. I did manage to make the bed and help my wonderful husband put up the wooden curtain rod we bought for the living room.

Speaking of my wonderful husband, I love him. He's awesome. He's wonderful. I'm so thankful Father blessed me with such a sensitive, gentle-heart of a man. And he's incredibly handsome. He let me lay down and try to sleep some of this headache off (it hasn't hurt like this since my drinking days...) and then he cooked supper. The man can make some mean hamburger steaks! I didn't even know he knew how to make those. We had our steaks, white beans, and some cornbread we had left over from last night. And then, instead of digging in like he usually does, he offered up prayer for meal, and a prayer for me. ****Awwwwwwww**** I had to try really hard to keep from tearing up, let me tell ya. Why did this make my day? He never offers to pray. I usually have to ask him, and then feel kinda awkward because I feel like I'm pressuring him. But he just did it tonight. I've been praying for this for a while, that God would put a desire to lead more in his heart, and maybe He's answering that prayer now. In His time. Well, whatever the reason, I am so thankful. God is so good!!
I don't know what I could have ever done to deserve the love I have, from my husband, and my Savior. Thank You, thank You, thank You, thank You.

And now I have a question. At Christmas, my uncle gave me a branch(?), or a cutting, a piece of a plant my grandmother has in her kitchen. The only thing is, I have no clue what it is! It's been in a glass of water in my kitchen and yesterday I put it into an old herb pot I have with some topsoil. Do you think this thing will live? All I know about it is that it's supposed to have orange blooms?

Also, how much room does a worm need? As I was raking up leaves yesterday, I found several of those little guys squirming around under the wet leaves. So I thought, "Maybe one or two will help my little plant-thingy". So, I have two living in my herb pot now. Do you think they'll be okay? Okay, I think that'll do it for this post. I hope everyone had a beautiful Saturday, and may you all have a blessed Sunday!!

Resolutions for 2009

2009-01-01T23:14:00.004-06:00

Okay, I know it’s practically a given that people don’t keep their New Year’s resolutions. However, I have Christ on my side, and we all know how things go when He gets involved *wink*

So, I will share them here, as they come to me, and with the Grace of God, I will achieve my goals and hopefully God will glorified through it.

~ Get my weight back down. I won’t lie; there is a superficial layer to this. I want to be as attractive physically as I was 2 years ago. I want to be visually pleasing to my husband so that he can really enjoy the wife of his youth, not just be dazzled by my charming wit and beautiful spirit (just a bit a sarcasm there *wink*) But also, I know I am not as healthy as I can and have been. My lax attitude toward what I put into this temple and gluttony has not been a wise one and it’s rearing its ugly head in more ways than one. But this time I aim to get back into a healthy lifestyle for the right reasons and in the right ways. Not to turn heads.

~ To be a woman of Proverbs 31
That I may be a woman my husband’s heart safely trusts in. That I may do him good and not evil. That I may rise early with a heart and mind set to taking care of what God entrusts me with and what my husband needs of me, in all aspects of life. That when I speak, my words will reflect a heart that God has made wise, and that my heart will reflect a spirit of gentleness and not vain or hasty words. That I may allow God to make me a wife worthy of praise.

~ Finish my online classes, and soon. My husband wishes this of me most. I hope I can keep my nose to the grindstone and make him proud.

“I can do all things through Him who strengthens me” Philippians 4:13

Thankful Thursday

2009-01-01T20:05:00.003-06:00

I am so thankful for so many things in my life, so many experiences He's brought me out of and so many things that He continues to deliver me from...His grace is so amazing and sufficient, it baffles my simple mind sometimes. But just a few things that come to mind this evening...

~ I am thankful for family.
Even if they can be dysfunctional at times and just as imperfect as I am,
God saw fit to bless me with them and maybe I can be
a blessing to them as well.

~I am thankful for the newness of each day.
Especially the hope a new year brings. Hopes and dreams that I can
truly be the woman and child God calls me to be,
for my family, for my husband, for my church, and for my community.

~I am thankful that God has promised me Himself when I need Him,
which is every day, every moment. That He has promised me
an eternity to understand Him, to worship Him, to love Him, to adore Him,
and that each day I get to see, in some small way, a little piece of what those promises
hold, of what that eternity might hold.

~I am thankful for the blessings that my sisters-in-Christ are to me,
even though we may never meet this side of Heaven. I am thankful for the
lessons and encouragement they are to me, even when I feel
most awkward and even though I worry about
silly things, like what others may think as they read my heart here.

I really have too many things to list here right now without going on and on and on...like I seem to be so good at. I gotta learn how to make things "short(er) and sweet"! If you'd like to see more thankfulness, you can follow the link: http://www.eph2810.com

Maybe one day I'll figure out how to make the links prettier :)

Auld Lang Syne

2008-12-31T08:48:00.003-06:00

"Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And never brought to mind?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And auld lang syne?"

Should old acquaintance be forgot,
And never brought to mind?
Should old acquaintance be forgot,
And days gone by?

Tonight 2008 will draw to a close, and 2009 will begin. I hope this coming year is a blessed one for all of us. It will probably be a trying one, with hostility toward the Truth of God growing and the economy as it is. But I remember the message our pastor shared with us this past Sunday and it was titled, "God's people will be more than fine in 2009". He had heard that title somewhere else and borrowed it. And it brought great comfort to me and really reassured in my heart something I had known all along.

"Ye are of God, little children, and have overcome them: because greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world." 1 John 4:4

"My Father, which gave them me, is greater than all; and no man is able to pluck them out of my Father's hand." John 10:29

I, as God's child, am going to be just fine. No matter what my circumstance may be, no matter if I end up poor in the sight of men, or if I am hungry, or even if I become homeless, my God is so much bigger than this place. I can rest in a secure salvation, I will rejoice in a Savior who is Sovereign and who is always with me, I will resist the world with the strength GOD provides and the promises He gives and I will remember the command to reach out to others, to try and meet them where they are because that's where God met me.

Should old acquaintance be forgot? I don't know. I had to let go of a few people this year, mostly because of losing my job (or being released, being freed, as I like to put it). But I did have to say goodbye to someone who had been a big part of my life for a while now. We had become so different that I could not any longer enjoy being with them. She was maid-of-honor in my wedding, and I was the same in hers. She was my best friend. We had met in nursing school about 4 years ago, and had become very close. I was there for her throughout her divorce from her abusive alcoholic husband, mostly in the form of her "partner in sin" as I see it now...better known as her best drinking buddy. And I was there for her when she remarried 6 months ago.

But can two walk together lest they be agreed? In August of 2007 I gave my life back to Christ. I was making a mess of it and my marriage and was tired of living life my way. God began to change my heart and I soon grew a great distaste for sin. Things I used to love and take part in regularly now disgusted me. But my friend would not, even to this day, let go of some things. And I know I cannot change people. Only the Holy Spirit can convict someone in their hearts, so I prayed for them, for her and her then soon-to-be husband. I continue to do so. I just don't understand how someone can read God's Word and then totally reject it, all the while claiming to be some follower of Christ. The last straw came a couple of weeks ago. They were both here at our home and I was excited to show her how blessed we had been with it. Things had become strained between us, I think mostly because of lack of compromise; me by not compromising what God says about certain things and by not going along with everyone else:"oh, whatever makes you happy, there are worse things out there...etc" and her not willing to compromise her comfortable lifestyle of partying and drinking to excess. But I still had hope for us. We had a relatively nice evening. I tried to overlook that every other word out of their mouths were curse words, and even using the Lord's name as profanity. I tried to overlook and had to bite my tongue that it seemed all the husband could talk about was of a sexual nature and just of juvenile habits. I even managed to keep my cool, for the most part, when we were discussing things of a medical nature (she's a RN and acted almost as if I were nothing but wrong when I talked about home births and that I just don't care for doctors and machines; I trust the body God gave me and the ability and sheer nature of that which I am. I tried to explain that I completely understood sometimes a hospital could not be helped and that there was a good purpose for all that, but I don't want to sell myself short without even trying) and I was made out to be a fool because I have some "old fashioned" ideas on things. But the final straw came when we were discussing the Bible. I lost it. I'm not proud of that, it's just the truth and I wish I would have kept my cool. But something about someone blaspheming the Word of God, in my home? Nope, sorry, I want no part of that and I will not take it laying down. She dared to use the phrase "It's 2008!" in reference to some apparent expiration date on the Bible, they must have taken the "best when used by:" sticker off my copy! Here I was being picked apart by an obviously much wiser person because I believe a woman's duty is to her home first, not the rest of the world. Because I believe when the Bible says "at home" that means, AT HOME. Because I read that and understand it as I believe God meant it to be is a greater calling than to be making $20.00 an hour at any job out there and regardless of what others say, to go against what God has put on my heart is disobedience, and that is sin. Do you have to agree with me? No! Are there circumstances where it cannot be avoided? I think that there could be and I believe God understands that. But for me to claim to be a Christian woman and not to give God's way a chance, trusting Him like He asks me to? To me, I would be sinning.

So, I had to "break-up" with her, I guess you could say. I hope I haven't burned that bridge completely, because I want to still be there for her if she needs me. I will still remember her in my prayers and in my heart, but I just can't be in her life. I cannot be condoning her lifestyle of drinking and parties and basically a complete disregard for the way God has commanded us to live by being in that atmosphere, and she has proven to me she will not have her life any other way. And it breaks my heart to have to let her go. I am now judgmental because of it. I don't try to be, I really don't think I am and I don't condemn people in my heart because that is not my place. And I have no right to...I used to be a horrible person. But I believe God has given us a standard to live by. If that makes me narrow-minded, I guess that's just how people will have to see me.

Argh!

2008-12-29T10:27:00.003-06:00

I am so aggravated right now. I'm trying really hard to keep my mouth shut and my heart from sinning in itself but I would really like to throw a temper tantrum. I was going to do a daybook post but I'm too disgusted with it right now. I guess I need a "Blogging for Dummies" book or something, but I cannot seem to add a picture or the daybook button without messing up the text of the post. And I have no clue how to make the links compacted (does that make any sense?) Man...I need some chewing gum. Anyone have any helpful articles you might point me to? Sister needs some help, lol.

So blessed!

2008-12-26T18:43:00.004-06:00

Does it make me a horrible person to be sorta kinda relieved that the most consumeristic holiday of this most materialistic country is almost over?

I love CHRISTmas. I love the smells of the season. I love the giving spirit, that encouragement that it's better to give than to receive...even if I see less and less of that truly acted out in people's attitudes each year. I love the music, the family and just the acknowledgement that seems to come along with it, that no matter the economic situation, being together with family and dear friends, laughing with them, hugging, loving them makes us much wealthier than we realize.

But what pains me about this past Christmas is that I don't remember hearing one mention (outside of church) of this being the day we celebrate Jesus' birth day. I know it's probable that my Savior wasn't born in winter, I know it's probable that our annual Christmas plays and songs aren't mirror reflections of how the blessed event took place, there are alot of "artistic liberties" that probably take place. But that isn't the point! The point is that God's Son willingly left His throne of glory and came to this sin-sick world in the most vulnerable form imaginable for us. For me. For you. For Billy Graham and for Marilyn Manson. And we turn it into what? Into something almost ugly. Into something that almost depresses many people. And me. I can't imagine how it must pain our Lord. But it pains me and for Christ Jesus to be so much more loving, more compassionate, more merciful than I can be on a really awesome day...it must break His heart. It kind of scares me...but it definitely shows where our world is today in priorities. We only want God and Christ in our daily lives when it's convenient for us or when we have no other choice. It's sad. Is it any wonder I just want to hide away from this world most days? And these are Christians!
God, please help me to have more compassion. More love. More mercy. I am seriously lacking in some of these. Not all the time, but alot of the time. And I know that saddens Him. But I'm not going to give up, I know He hasn't. Everyday He works on me and even when I am at my worst He will remind me that I am His, and noone...nothing...can pluck me from His hand. And for this I owe Him my life. I certainly am a work in progress. Thank You for not giving up on me, for not giving me up. Thank you so much. We really did have a blessed CHRISTmas.

We are blessed beyond measure. Blessed beyond what we could ever deserve. Every day we are blessed, not just one day a year. And one day a year is not enough time to even begin to show how blessed we feel. In fact, it's going to take me a whole eternity, or longer, to truly share my thankfulness. I can barely even talk, it chokes me up something fierce :) But I would like to share a few ways He has so richly blessed us, beginning at home.

We have been in our new home since the first of November, we have "owned" (if you can call paying someone else for our home owning, lol) it since the end of July. I don't buy into the "prosperity gospel" but I have read His Promises and I do believe He gave us this desire of our hearts, but in His time. His timing is perfect, always :) We had actually been seeking different opportunities to leave the rent house we were in for various reasons I won't get into right now. We had been playing with ideas and looking around and had even come to see this house. It was an estate sale, the previous owner had passed on and his children weren't able to keep it up and no one really wanted to move into it so they had decided to sell it. We expressed interest, as did others, because of the wonderful price they were asking in comparison with other asking prices. And then my sister needed a place to stay. We were really her only option at the time so she, and sometimes my nephew, came to live with us for a little while. We heard no word, nothing about the house, and started to become sort of concerned. We had seen this wonderful house, with wonderful potential, and I just knew in my heart that we were meant to have this home, I could just feel it. So my sister leaves us and it probably wasn't two weeks later we received a call asking if we were still interested in the house. !!!!!!!!!! I knew God had answered our prayers!! He provided us with what our hearts were desiring, and I really believe it was because we earnestly prayed for it and not because we deserved it. God owes us nothing. But He generously gives us everything. All our praise is due Him. Every time we thought we saw a wall coming close, He has knocked them down. And even though we aren't "cutting edge" or at the same level as the Jones's, who cares? We have so much more than some people...alot of people nowadays. Blessed beyond measure. So much more than the necessities. And I may get ridiculed for the lack of concern I express for much more than the necessities, but that I guess is the nature of the world we are in now.

So I wanted to share a few pictures of the relatively short journey God has allowed us to have. It's a journey I'm sure we're not close to ending, but one that I'm so grateful for thus far, even the hills :)

This was our kitchen before

Our livingroom before

Our entryway, before

Master bath, before

Master bedroom, before

Guest bedroom, before

Utility room, before

I know this is such a long post, but please bare with me...we're almost done!
Now the afters...I know it's not perfect and we've really just begun and I was in the middle of attempting to decorate for CHRISTmas and as much as I would love to be, I'm just not Martha Stewart, people! Oh well :)

Living room, after

Kitchen, after

Entryway, after

Master bath, after paint and new tub/shower, before vanity and new floor

Master bedroom, after

Guest bedroom, after...well, in the middle

Utility room after

I've got a bunch of in-progress pictures too, but I think I've been a bore long enough. I'll be back :)

Neat-o!

2008-12-23T21:10:00.004-06:00

How cool is this? A signature for blogs! I've been to some wonderful blogs, many of them are in my sidebar on the right, and they've got wonderful ways that they close their blogs, and they all are so warm and genuine and just seem to fit them. I hate to just leave it blank because these blogs are supposed to be like a conversation, right? You don't talk to someone and then just hang up on them or turn around and walk off...at least not the ones you enjoy talking to, lol. Kidding!! I will admit I've had the urge before but I've never actually been that rude. But I feel funny "signing off"...cheesy even. I'm weird. So I was just tickled pink when I saw this on another blog! How cute :) And it even sorta kinda (when I'm feeling really good and I have an awesome pen) looks like my handwriting, hehehe. Feel free to grab one for yourself!

My new shiny signature :)...

The Simple Woman's Daybook 12-22-08

2008-12-22T08:39:00.004-06:00

(got this from peggy at http://thesimplewomansdaybook.blogspot.com/ )

FOR TODAY...

Outside my window...I can see the sun trying to warm the frozen earth

I am thinking... that my mind is much lighter without the baggage of the past

I am thankful for... my husband who gives me more love than I could ever deserve

From the kitchen... just finished clean-up after breakfast

I am wearing... sweat pants way to big for me and a warm thermal shirt

I am creating... not a whole lot

I am going... to study shortly after this

I am reading... and re-reading the instructions for this post thingy to make sure I'm doing it right

I am hoping... our rain forecast this week doesn't result in disastrous roadways

I am hearing... Good Morning America and the washing machine

Around the house... things are quiet and warm

One of my favorite things... the peacefulness of a sunny winter morning

A few plans for the rest of the week: do a little cooking, alot of studying, general housework, being with my dear loved ones and celebrating the birth of the Savior of the world

Here is picture thought I am sharing..

...a picture from our honeymoon, a little over 3 yrs ago.

Down To The Nitty Gritty

2008-12-20T21:38:00.003-06:00

I do not miss the workforce. I do not miss getting up at 3 in the morning and having to leave the house by 4:30 to be at work by 5:15 just to slave away for ten hours, tied to a station like an old milk cow, while "the Man" sucked precious time from my life, just so I could line up at the end of the day like an animal off to the slaughter, not feeling much different than such. I didn't feel like I was living for anything but the time clock most of the time. There is, however, one aspect I miss. Alot. Regimen. Start work at 5:30, break at 7:30, work some more, break at 9:30, work some more, lunch at 11:45, work some more, break at 2:15, go home at 4:30. When I was a gym rat I would be home by 7 most evenings, fix dinner by 7:30, in bed by 9:30 (wow...what kind of wife would you call that? I call it "sad"). I was so tired, all the time. But I had my times set and I got things done. Even after working all day long, I got things done.

Now, for the confession. I haven't done such a great job lately. I have been a poor manager of my time and I'm afraid I've made my husband suffer for it. I haven't been a good steward of the time God has given me, after practically begging for it. Why? I don't have a schedule. I started out okay, when I was first laid-off. I got up early, and got to movin'. I partly blame the new bed. Oh my...if you have never slept on a pillow-top mattress...that is a slippery slope. I've become a sleep glutton! But seriously...sloth is not a virtue. And I've been spending way, way, way too much time on the computer. Namely on Myspace. That's another reason I've decided to take my profile off their network. I've been sucked in, like so many others. I joined mainly to keep in touch with family, and that led to browsing other profiles, and time disappears and before I realize it, hours are gone. Wasted. Dashed against the rocks.

So now I am so far behind in my online classes I'm ashamed of myself. My husband is disappointed in me. I am harder on myself than he is on me, so I am extremely emotional about it right now. I love my husband. If I were not a Christian, I would be very close to worshipping him, in my heart. That's just the truth about it. God has blessed me so much with giving me this man as a husband, I can't even express in words how much I love him. He's really awesome. He's a Mr. Steady, for whoever has read "Created to Be His Helpmeet" by Debi Pearl. Father knew I couldn't hold up with a Mr. Command and I'm already kooky enough so I really didn't need a Mr. Visionary. He knew I needed a Mr. Steady. So, I am implementing a schedule, starting Monday. Probably not the best time, seeing as Christmas is next week, but why put off tomorrow what can be done today? Well, not today, and not tomorrow (Sunday, our Sabbath) but the next day. I do feel some accomplishment that I have spent the majority of the day in my class.

I've got my tentative daily schedule written out. I say tentative because I don't know what each day holds, but with the encouragement of the Lord and a little of His Strength, I will accomplish what I can. Prayerfully, all of it. So here goes nothin'

6 AM ~ wake & shower...make coffee

7-7:30 ~ start laundry, if applicable, sweep room(s)...some sort of little tidying chore
start breakfast & prepare DH's lunch

8-9 ~ breakfast & devotion

9:30-12 ~ studying

12:00-1:00 ~ lunch! maybe check e-mails, blogland

2:00-3:00 ~ OFF THE COMPUTER! various housework, gorceries

3:00-4:30 ~ nose to the education grindstone...study!

4:30-6:30ish ~ cook & have dinner
clean-up & dishes

8:00-9:00 ~ study

10:30 ~ bedtime

I plan to make a couple copies of this, if necessary, and put the up in a couple of places. I gotta get back into a productive groove or...I don't even want to think of the consequences.

Words of Love

2008-12-19T16:27:00.003-06:00

"Rejoice in the Lord always: and again I say, Rejoice. Let your moderation be known unto all men. The Lord is at hand. Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you." ~~Philippians 4:4-9

My first post, my "mission statement"

2008-12-19T08:53:00.003-06:00

I chose "forever student" as the title of my blog for obvious and maybe not so obvious reasons. I am always learning new things and generally love these lessons. I also seem to be literally a perpetual student. Right now I am working on a certification for medical transcription that has the mind-blowing progress of a herd of turtles. Before this I was in nursing school for about 6 months when the money ran out. Before that I was enrolled at a community college for "general studies", I had wanted to be a teacher but that got derailed along the way. Before that was high school. Sometimes I don't feel like I've accomplished much in these 26 years. But I still have many many more to go, if the Good Lord is willing. But should He take me home tomorrow, I'll be okay with that too ;)

The reason I am starting this blog, apart from the inspiration of many of my sisters-in-Christ, is to help keep myself accountable and to get away from another "online networking community". I have a "space" that is "my" own already, but it really isn't mine. It's basically become a billboard for things and people I do not feel comfortable seeing as a woman who disdains immodesty and blatant advertising of all things sexually immoral. So, I am creating a space that is truly mine, where I can edit what I want and what I do not want on it. And a place to share my heart and thoughts from time to time. Even if it is just for myself to see. And pictures! I love pictures :)

So, my little blog spot may not be exciting, it probably won't ever be flashy or cool as the ones I love visiting, but I'll share with you the ones I do enjoy. They do my heart much good, and I always seem to be learning things from them. And isn't that part of the journey? :)

forever student

Spring is here!!

Some of the Goings-On...

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.....might it be a post???

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Oh, To Hear the Pitter Patter!!

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Well...

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“People tell me judge not lest ye be judged. I always tell them, twist not scripture lest ye be like satan.”–Paul Washer

Mamaw's Jalapeno Cornbread

Praise GOD from Whom ALL blessings flow!!

Crazy 8's!

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What's the point??

Regarding the last post's comments...

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And just to clarify

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Torn

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The Simple Woman's Daybook

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Argh!

So blessed!

Neat-o!

The Simple Woman's Daybook 12-22-08

Down To The Nitty Gritty

Words of Love

My first post, my "mission statement"

“People tell me judge not lest ye be judged. I always tell them, twist not scripture lest ye be like satan.”
–Paul Washer

Random thoughts...I get alot of those...